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“What,” Jackson grinds out, his voice like ice, “where you fuckin’ thinking? Do you have any fuckin’ idea what you’ve done? The kind of fuckin’ shit you have brought on this club? Not only are we now dealin’ with dangerous fuckin’ men, but we have an extra problem we didn’t need. God dammit, Addison, I know I wasn’t around for most of your life, but I never thought you’d be so fuckin’ stupid.”
A lump forms in my throat and tears burn under my eyelids, but I don’t argue—what’s the point. He’s right. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t fucking hurt to hear him yell at me in a way he’s never done.
He’s never looked at me with rage like it.
“God dammit, I’m so fucking wild with you right now. The fact that you not only put your life in danger, but everyone in this club and your own fuckin’ daughter.”
That hits me like a blow to the chest, a blow that has me reeling back, pressing a hand to my chest as my tears burst forth and roll down my cheeks. I’d never do anything to hurt Skye, but tonight, I did something, and I didn’t think of how it could come back and hurt everyone else. That’s no different, really, is it?
“I’ve never been so fuckin’ disappointed in you,” Jackson roars, throwing his hands up. “Get the fuck out of my sight.”
A sob rips from my throat as I turn, rushing out before I can possibly hear another word that breaks my soul into a thousand pieces. Jackson has never spoken to me like that, and it burns. It burns in a way I never thought it could. Tears pouring down my cheeks, I reach the compound fence and grip it with my fingers, crying out loudly as pain courses through me.
What the hell did I do?
I’ve destroyed everything.
“OH MY GOD, ADDISON, are you okay?”
Janine is at our place, watching Skye. Cade must have called her over when I told him where I was. I know I look terrible; my body is all cut and bruised and my eyes are puffy from crying so hard. Stepping forward, Janine doesn’t even question me, she just puts her arms around me and holds me tight.
“I got you.”
“I fucked up so bad, J,” I croak. “I don’t know what to do ...”
Pulling back, she swipes the tears from my face and holds it in her hands. “You’re going to shower, you’re going to hug your baby, and you’re going to worry about the rest tomorrow.”
“I’m so sorry you had to come watch Skye ...”
She waves her hand, shaking her head. “I love that girl. She is such a good little one.”
“Thank you,” I whisper.
Once she leaves, I walk over to the mat on the floor where Skye is playing, already bathed and ready for bed. Leaning down, I pick her up into my arms and hold her to me. I breathe in her fresh, clean scent and nestle my face into her beautiful hair. Crying out, I know she’s ready for a bottle, so I hold her while I prepare it. Then, I go to her room and sit, feeding it to her as she slowly dozes off to sleep.
Once she’s tucked up in bed, I walk to the bathroom and stare at myself in the mirror.
I look absolutely horrible.
My entire face is covered in tiny scratches, some blood spots, and it is puffy and bloated from crying. My eyes are bloodshot, and my hair is a mess. Slowly, I take my clothes off and inspect the damage on my body. Mostly scratches, some bruises, and a few larger cuts that might take a little longer to heal but nothing major.
Turning on the shower, I step inside, crying out when the warm water hits my skin, causing a slight burn to radiate through my body. Every single part of me has something that is irritated by the water. Closing my eyes, more tears slip from my eyes as I stand under the water, exhausted and not lifting my hands even to wash myself.
A moment later, the shower door opens, and I lift my head to see Cade, fully naked, staring at me. The rage in his eyes has died down and now he looks a little calmer. Stepping into the shower, he surprises me when he pulls me into his arms. The moment my face hits his chest, I burst out crying again. It feels as though there is nothing left, but here it comes all the same.
He holds me until the tears subside, and then he washes me, carefully running a cloth over every inch of my body, ensuring each trace of blood, dirt and muck is gone. Then, we get out and he wraps me in a towel, leading me to the bedroom. As if he couldn’t get any better, he takes my pajamas and he helps me dress before running a brush through my hair.
I couldn’t possibly love him more in this moment.
I fucked up, in the biggest way possible, and he’s still taking care of me.
Once he’s done, he takes my chin in his hand and stares down at me. “You fucked up tonight, sugar, in a big way, but your intentions were pure. Your dad had no right to say the things he did.”
“He’s right,” I croak. “I am a god damned idiot and I put everyone at risk. I just ... I just wanted to help, to find answers. The idea of Clara being out there, being tortured ...”
Cade presses his finger to my lips. “Didn’t get it, for a long fuckin’ time, but I do now. You can’t close your eyes at night knowin’ she could be livin’ the life you did. I’m sorry I didn’t see that before. The fact that you care so much about someone you never met is a fuckin’ trait so few people have.”
“I might not have met her,” I whisper, “but she’s your blood, and that makes her my family.”
