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I reach out my hand, and he unhooks the leash. Waffles bounds over but stops at Finn’s command, sitting before me and begging for pets. I give him a good scratch, and he slobbers all over me, causing me to laugh and wipe my hands on my yoga pants.
“Sorry about that. He gets excited,” Finn says guiltily, running his hand along the back of his head.
“It’s cool. He’s a charmer, so I’ll allow it.”
Waffles takes that as a sign, curling up at my feet and closing his eyes. I wish I could sleep that easily.
Finn stands awkwardly, eyeing me.
“Thanks for the in with your sister. Emmaline’s first day was today. She loved it.”
“Least I could do. Mind if I sit?”
I scoot over on the step, making room for him. He settles beside me, elbows on his knees. He smells sharp today, with more leather and fresh-cut wood than open air in his scent. Still, it’s enough to make me squirm, my body heating at his nearness. I take a sip of my drink as a distraction.
“How’s the lock?” he asks after a moment.
“No new escapes, but she’s biding her time.”
Finn’s laugh is throaty and quick. “She’s kind of amazing.”
“Yeah, she is. You’re out late. Can’t sleep?” I ask, turning to look at him. I feel the heat of his gaze from the corner of my eye.
“My mind is too busy. It’s hard on nights when Reid is gone. Lonely,” he admits, leaning back.
I nod in understanding, feeling that loneliness in my bones. Sometimes I feel like a melon, my insides scooped out until I’m only rind. The feeling of something missing was present with Trent, but it’s grown into a vast chasm. I feel so small against the world’s bigness that I don’t know if I can stand it.
“Can I tell you a secret?” he asks.
“By all means. You’ve seen all my dirty laundry. Show me yours.”
He chuckles, then he’s quiet for so long I don’t think he’ll tell me anything. “I always thought we’d have a pack and never worried about the quiet nights those first few years. I should have. I never want Reid to feel bad about doing what he loves. So I adjusted, but sometimes the nights are long.”
“I can relate to long nights.” I sigh.
Finn brushes against me, his body heat causing me to shiver.
“What’s got you up tonight?” he asks.
“See, there are these two guys—” I start, and Finn laughs.
“Do tell.”
“And they won’t seem to take no for an answer. Even though I have made it clear I’m not looking for a good time.”
“Who isn’t looking for a good time?” He scoffs. “Good times don’t mean casual.”
I turn on him, searching his face in the moonlight. “Did you mean it? About wanting a big pack?”
“Yeah.”
“Betas too?”
“One beta in particular,” he says.
“How come you don’t? Have a big pack, I mean.”
He shrugs. “Never found anyone I thought would fit until recently.”
