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“It’s only been a few weeks, Mum.”
“A few weeks, but the first time you’ve been away from home. Let me be your mum and miss you for a minute.”
“Okay. Are we going to Molly’s?”
“Of course. It’s tradition.”
I pull myself out of her hold and turn to say goodbye to Jeremy. He’s hanging back by the car, but my bags are out already, next to it.
“So, I’ll speak to you soon?” he asks.
“Of course. You can always come here, you know. Put those wheels of yours to good use. You’ll need a break from the fancy food. Molly’s whenever you want.” My words put a smile on his face, and it holds off the pang I feel from saying goodbye. It’s only for a few weeks — it shouldn’t feel like saying goodbye.
“My treat next time, then.”
“Deal.” He steps in, and I’m sure he’s going to kiss me, but his whole body seems to stop before he raises his eyes to look past me. “Tomorrow night?” He puts his arms around me and hugs me harder than Mum did.
“Tomorrow.”
Tregethworth is one of my favourite places in the world. Being here with Mum is a tradition that I never want to break. It’s good for my soul to be here but having a boyfriend down the road is a pull that’s hard to resist. Lazy days soaking up the sun on the beach are suddenly different without him to look at. In fact, everything’s changed, like my world’s off-kilter without him. It’s not the same.
It’s sad. I don’t want to be that girl who drops everything for the boy in her life — but now I’ve got the boy, my view is different. I want to spend my time with him.
Mum knows. She has a forlorn look on her face as though she’s sad about something, but I don’t want to ask her what because I don’t want to feel guilty. The summer used to be the time for us to spend together, but Jeremy has shifted that.
This summer is one for making memories and having the time of my life, and I want to be selfish and take it.
The laid-back and slow pace of our holiday activities is the same as every year, but they don’t offer the same level of contentment. There’s an itch under my skin — in my very blood — that keeps me from fully relaxing, and it’s Jeremy. He’s the constant in my mind and in my heart, but I refuse to let it rule all my actions, and I make sure that Mum feels that she has my attention, too, and that I’m not just waiting for him.
Jeremy joins me for more time than I first thought he would. He’s often outside in the car waiting as I come out of the cottage, even when I’m not expecting him. We find a balance that even Mum is happy with. She even invites him to The Port William for dinner as we celebrate my birthday.
For the rest of our stay, the weather is hot, and the beach is crowded, but with Jeremy next to me on the sand, I don’t care. Thanks to the prolonged exposure, my normally pale skin is about as sun-kissed as it’s ever been.
Mum’s had some success with a new gallery that opened up down the road. Everything has worked out better than I could have hoped for.
Until it’s time to leave.
“Are you nearly ready?” Mum calls up to me as I’m finishing packing.
I come downstairs with my bag.
“Hey, what’s up?” She frowns at me.
“You know Jeremy’s asked me to stay with him for the rest of the summer?”
“Yes, but I thought we agreed that was a lot of time to be spending with him. That coming home and having some space would be good. You’ve been together down here for over a month.”
“Well, I’ve changed my mind,” I state, and I hold my breath as I wait for her response.
She looks at me like she’s figuring something out. “Is there anything I can say that will change your mind?” Her voice is calm, and I know the pause was to stop her first reaction.
I think about that for a moment, but I know I want to do this, so I shake my head.
“Baby,” she grabs my hands and holds them. “Are you sure?”
“I love him, Mum. I want to stay with him. It might be the only summer we get this, and I want to have fun.”
She nods. “I know.” She pulls me against her and hugs me tightly. “Be careful. And phone in all the time, okay? And you’ve got to call Sammy to explain.”
