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I nod.
“Don’t be. I’ve wanted to do this since the first night we were here.”
He kisses me slowly and deeply, and everything I love about kissing Jeremy soars to the surface, burning the nerves to dust. My hands pull at his T-shirt, and I reach for his warm skin, pulling him closer to me.
It’s enough to kick him into action, and he picks me up and stumbles backwards until we fall onto the bed, squealing as we do. We laugh around our kiss, but it breaks that first awkwardness.
We’re all hands and lips from then on, and I’m grateful for the gloom of the room as we both escape our clothes. Lying on my back, I wait for him to take off my underwear. He’s seen me in a bikini plenty of times, but this is a big step. Nobody has seen me naked, but I want this. I want my first to be with him.
His hand trails across my collarbone and down my chest, sending nerves dancing over my skin. He pushes the strap of my bra down and then licks a trail to my breast with his tongue.
Sensations riot over my body as he pulls my nipple into his mouth, and I gasp and arch at his touch.
“Ohh.” I bite my lip, embarrassed by the sound I make.
“God, you’re so fucking sexy.” He sucks harder, and my body bows under him as if he’s pulling strings I didn’t know I had.
His hand runs south and slips under my knickers and through my folds. “Anna. God, you’re wet.” He rests his head on my chest as his finger pushes at my entrance. It feels tight, but I widen my legs for him, wanting him to keep going.
“I’m going to make sure you’re ready, okay.”
I can’t see his eyes, but I nod.
He pushes in and out, circling and rubbing, and I can feel the muscles in my stomach tighten and tense. It feels good, like there’s something to come.
And then he sits up, pulls his own boxers down, and leans over to the drawer. The crinkling sound paints the rest of the picture, and I’m glad he’s got protection so we can skip the conversation about whether he has or not.
He kneels between my legs and positions his penis where his fingers were.
“Wait!” I push my hands onto his chest. “Put the light on. I want to see you when we do this.”
He scrambles off and reaches for the side light, flooding the room with a glow. “Better?” He comes back and leans over me, kissing me on the nose.
“Much.”
He moves back into the position between my legs and leans down on his arm. “Take a deep breath.” I do, and with it, he pushes into me.
My breath hitches as the pressure grows and stings a little. I look up at Jeremy, who is still and staring at me. His eyes are dark, not like the myriad blues I can get lost in, but then he smiles before shifting and pressing further inside me.
“I’ll go slowly,” he says and nods, lowering his body onto mine and then inching forward and back.
The more he moves, the better it feels, taking the initial pain away.
My hands wrap around his shoulders, happy to run over the chords of muscles, and he lifts himself so I can see him better.
His moves get bigger and more urgent, and his breathing grows laboured. I run my hands through his hair, making sure he’s looking at me — staring at me when it happens.
“God, Anna. Tell me you like this.”
“Yes, I like it. Keep going,” I breathe.
“I want this to be good for you, but I really want to fuck you.”
“Then do it,” I say, desperate for him to get lost in me.
His head drops, but he doesn’t change anything. He keeps gently rocking back and forth.
“Jere, it’s okay.”
