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I thought he’d be mine. I thought things would change. But I was wrong.
We both keep to our word. We go back to how things were before the summer — before our kiss.
We’re civil in science. No conversation other than what’s needed for the lesson.
And it kills me. Every word said is like a nail digging into my heart, slowly making me bleed.
At night, my phone is empty of messages, and I miss them. I miss him.
And I can’t tell if Jeremy looks worse than before — he’s got his broody image as his armour, and right now, it’s pristine. Maybe he regrets it. Maybe he doesn’t, and it was all a game for him. A cruel experiment like so many teen romcoms are about — tricking the nerdy girl and then actually falling in love. But if that was the idea, why hasn’t he changed his mind?
At least our mock exams loom — they give me a purpose and a good distraction from a broken heart.
And, after a few weeks, it’s easier to forget about what it was like with him in my life, especially as he was only half in.
It’s the first day of mocks. Even though they don’t really count, I’m still nervous — I have to do well next year if I intend to go to university.
We all gather outside the hall and wait to go in, find our seats, and hopefully, not forget everything we’ve been cramming for the last few weeks.
I see Jeremy, but I don’t keep my eyes on him. I’ve become adept at ignoring him. Of course, everyone else still notices him. He still turns girls down like it is a hobby. But instead of wondering why now, I just feel a little sad.
“Good luck.” Sammy grabs my hand and squeezes before we file inside in silence.
She’s sitting two rows over from me. Jeremy is right near the front as we are alphabetically seated.
The energy and nerves thrum through my system, and I can’t help but tap my foot on the floor, bouncing it up and down.
“You may begin.”
Ninety minutes later, and we’re free.
“Oh, that was awful. I hated every minute.”
“Me too. One down, though. Come on. What are you doing?—”
“Anna!” I hear my name in the crowd, and we both turn.
Jeremy is pushing his way through the rest of us. I should move and keep walking, but my feet stay glued to the floor.
“Come on.” Sammy tries to steer me away, but I can’t. I need to know what he wants to say.
He arrives and stands in front of me. The sun beams down, making his eyes bright and beautiful.
I’ve missed tilting up to see his face. And then he leans in and kisses me. No words, no explanation — he just brushes his lips against mine until he deepens the kiss, just like our first time. I stand on tiptoes and fling my arms around his neck, desperate to hold on to him. He wraps his arm around me as he keeps kissing me.
I’m vaguely aware of where we are and of the people around us, but I don’t care.
He’s finally made his choice, and I’m it.
Chapter Seven
Jeremy
When I saw her in that restaurant, I knew. I could get to know her without the crap of everyone at school hassling me.
All my life, it had been a curse. Anyone I liked, girls or boys, only wanted to be friends because of my money. Party this, or football tickets that. I was their personal fucking Santa Claus. It was pathetic.
And it only got worse as I got older.
