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“I’m going to fucking fire you one of these days for your cheek.”
Levi laughed. “No you fucking won’t. No one else would put up with half the shit you put on me and you know it.”
He had a point. About what he dealt with, and about Lennox. I was a dickhead, but unless I got my head back in the game of protecting him, there wouldn’t be much point in any of the other things that I thought and felt about him. I was muddying the waters, and fucking up the job at hand. No matter how much banter Levi wanted to level at me about it, that much could not be denied.
“Don’t fuck it up, boss,” he said grimly with a soft pat on my shoulder.
“I’ll do my best.” I nodded, and he disappeared off to head to the venue.
An hour later Lennox caught me in an idle moment. “Can we talk for a minute?”
Feeling like a deer caught in headlights, I nodded.
“I don’t mean to sound like an insecure, needy idiot or anything, but I just wanted to know if we could clarify a little of what’s been happening between us.”
Oh fuck, here it comes.
“We’ve been getting closer, haven’t we?”
I bow my head once to gesture my agreement.
“I got the feeling that something was starting to develop between us. I was just wondering if that was something you wanted to continue even after the tour, to keep seeing me, and to see where all this was going to end up?”
The hopefulness in his voice pulled at my chest. I wanted to tell him yes, I wanted to say that I was very much attracted to him in a way that I had never been attracted to anyone else ever. That there was a vulnerability to him which made me want to protect him from the moment I met him, and that pull had only gotten stronger as the tour had gone on. That I wanted nothing more than to explore every possibility of this budding relationship and see where it went. That I hoped it would lead into something deep and fulfilling and with the potential of being lifelong.
Instead, something totally different came out of my mouth. “I think it would be better to hold off on that until the whole Natasha thing is sorted out, don’t you? I would hate for something to happen to you because I wasn’t focusing on the reason I’m here.”
I saw it on his face the second he registered what I had said. I was a wanker. I was the very dickhead Levi had accused me of being earlier. Lennox’s disappointment and hurt flashed across his features, even if it was for the briefest of moments before he composed himself and nodded.
“Right. Of course, you’re absolutely right. I shouldn’t have mentioned it. Consider it shelved until this whole thing is tied up.”
He didn’t say anything else and neither did I. He simply turned on his heel, walked back into his own bedroom and closed the door. Guilt flooded every inch of me and it took everything I had to not open the door and tell him I was sorry. I wanted to pull him against me and kiss him with all the passion I could muster.
His life was on the line, and I honestly thought that I couldn’t let myself have the luxury of anything else in case I mucked it all up, regardless of the fact I was very clearly mucking it all up anyway.
I spent the rest of the day burying myself in work.
Lennox had been on stage for just forty minutes when I got a call from the desk sergeant down at the local police station. He said he had someone who had matched Natasha’s description brought in over a speeding incident. Since I knew who I was looking for, he wanted me to come down and verify that it was actually her.
I told Levi what had happened and left. Jumping in my car, I headed to the police station in the hopes that it would actually be her, and we would be able to finally get the threat to Lennox under control.
CHAPTER 18
LENNOX
Something was off. I didn’t know what it was, but coming off stage in Glasgow, there was something that just didn’t feel right. I shook my head, trying to dismiss my thoughts and feelings as something else; stupidity on my part. I had expected Tom to drop everything and want to be with me as much as I wanted to be with him. He had been absolutely right. We did need to wait until the madness of a stalker and the forced closeness that had been thrust upon us was over. It was the right call—even if it did sting.
Carl hugged me with a massive grin on his face. “Lennox, that was fucking amazing! They love you, and the new song went down fantastically!”
Some of my nerves disappeared, and I smiled, leaning into his hug. He was right, the new song I had played for the first time tonight had the crowd captivated. They really loved it. It gave me hope for the new album I was working on, and how it was going to be received.
Levi also nodded in my direction. “Nice gig, mate. They really loved you tonight! Are you ready?”
I smiled at him. “Yeah, they really did. Where did Tom go?”
Levi’s mouth pulled a grim line. “He had a call from the local cop shop about a lead on Natasha.”
I nodded. “Did you get the toy ray out of my dressing room?”
