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Quentin pushed the door open to the salad place, a boot on his leg and a smirk on his face. He scanned the room and nodded at a few people before he strutted to our table. He always had a gait to him that screamed confidence. It suited him well for hockey, and after we lost our dad, I was glad he still had a spark to him.
“Hey.” I cleared my throat as a flicker of anxiety bubbled in my stomach. He told me he had a plan to get back at Theo last time we briefly spoke, and even thinking about it bothered me.
“You get me something already or should I order?”
I shook my head. “Order for yourself.”
He narrowed his eyes at me, his head tilting to the side as he studied me. “You alright, Audrey?”
Pressing my lips together, I nodded but avoided his gaze. Quentin was my brother. My only real family left. He’d held me when I sobbed over losing our dad and had taken me to the movies to get my mind off the grief. He made me laugh through those tough years and became my best friend.
We’d talked about our hopes and dreams. He’d opened up about what made him sad, but those moments were years ago.
He wasn’t the same person he used to be, and the fact he dismissed me so easily Monday hurt me deeply.
I wiped my sweaty palms on my legs and took a sip of the iced tea, wetting the back of my throat to ease the growing tension. We used to check in with each other, and I’d enjoy the time. I’d learn about his friends, his classes, his teammates. But now? I didn’t have anything to ask.
Ask him about Theo’s mentorship.
The thought intruded, and I begged it to leave. Theo would be like politics between us: we just didn’t talk about it.
“Alright, I’m gonna need like four salads with how hungry I am.” He laughed and sat across from me, his familiar scent reminding me of home. He wore the same cologne my dad bought him when he turned sixteen.
“Yeah.” I played with my fork, desperate to try to keep normalcy between us. “Make sure you eat enough.”
“Why won’t you look at me?”
“Hm?” I glanced at his face, keeping mine neutral. My skin heated at his scrutiny.
“What’s wrong?”
I shook my head. “I’m fine. Busy. Studying, as you know.”
He frowned and ran a hand over his face. “You’re mad about Monday still?”
The tone he used had me on edge. He was about to blame me for it. I knew it. There was no apology in his tone or awareness. When had my brother become mean?
It didn’t matter. It was easier to diffuse, to deflect. Move on. It hit me then, that I’d done this hundreds of times. Avoided confrontation because it stressed me out and in the process let my own feelings go unnoticed. Like they didn’t matter.
“It’s fine,” I said, keeping my voice neutral. “How’s hockey?”
“Ha.” He rolled his eyes and leaned back into the chair. He took my words at face value. He always did.
Did I want him to realize that he’d upset me? Yeah. I did. I wanted him to realize it and apologize, but that day would never come.
“Your nursing buddy is such a dick. Told me the team would turn against me once they saw him play. Are you kidding me? Loyalty goes further than skill on the ice. I can’t with this dude. Sanders is the fucking worst.”
But he wasn’t.
I opened my mouth to say that but snapped it shut. Again, confrontation wasn’t my style. “You said he’s mentoring you?”
His eyes flashed. “Sure. We can call it that. I don’t know what Reiner is playing at, but Theo and I meet once a week to talk and learn from each other. What a joke. What do I have to learn from him?”
“He’s drafted already, right? You could ask questions?—”
“Whose side are you even on, Audrey? Jesus Christ. Just cause he’s a fucking nurse like you, you’re picking his side? What’s the point of family then?” He glared at me, his face containing so much disdain it stole my breath away.
This wasn’t the brother I loved. The guy who was my equal, my friend. I wanted to cry with how different he was now, that I’d been blind to it for so long out of fear of confrontation.
