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A gentle click echoed in my ears as I pushed the door shut.
She looked ahead, not holding me or fighting me.
A look of defeat pulled her eyebrows down as her fingers wrapped around my shirt.
It was almost like she didn’t want to be here.
Long strides took us closer to the glow lighting up the front room and the silhouette of a short, stocky man moving around. I stopped dead, feet sinking into the mud.
My stomach rolled, vengeance drifting in my veins. My grip tightened on Feebee’s skinny legs, red mist again clouding my vision and corrupting my actions. I loosened my touch, feeling guilty for the bruises I was giving her. I forced my vision away from the man I hated, to the woman I didn’t. She snuggled into my chest, confusing the fuck out of me. A tear rolled from her eyes. Another followed, calling forth an army of sadness, all rushing to form an alliance with the rain to drown me.
My emotions were already doing that.
I trembled. Shaking it off, I blamed the cold, but I knew the truth.
“Please...” she begged, her voice so delicate and innocent.
I took another step, my feet struggling with moving toward the house.
“No!” Her voice was a whisper and a shout. “Please, don’t.”
She knew of my desire to end her father’s life but didn’t know my plan to hold back. Because all the things I felt for her trumped the hate I felt for him.
Her hand came up, fingers pulled into a fist. I clenched my jaw, ready for the impact, but she didn’t hit me.
She hit herself.
Hard.
In the chest.
And then she did it again.
“No!” It was such a small word, yet it came out so wrong. A sound that sounded like nothing...just noise.
She stopped moving, her pretty blue eyes looking at my mouth.
Feeling embarrassed and frustrated, I let go of one of her legs, letting it dangle. My palm clutched her back, crashing her chest to mine and protecting it.
She hit out at me, inaudible pleas creeping inside my shirt and hiding from my ears as she nuzzled in.
I grew taut, trying hard to listen beyond the sound of rain, wind, and the low hum of music in the distance.
“Please, don’t.”
Was she begging for his life?
Her pleas wouldn’t stop me from killing him. But the fact that she would never look at me the same way had already secured his fate. Because who knew how long I would be able to stay away from her?
No doubt, I would return in a few weeks, offering the pretense of medical exams, which I would give, of course, among other things. Ethan didn’t think I would make it a few weeks, and he couldn’t wait to tell me in his oh-so-annoying voice as I carried Feebee to the car earlier.
“Please don’t make me go back there.” Her words stopped me dead, my feet sinking into the mud. “You don’t hate me that much. Today, you cared.” Her nails scratched at my skin, the thin marks allowing her words to seep in. “I can’t go back there. Please, just take me home with you...or kill me. Just fucking kill me.”
I turned to stone, my eyes flicking between Feebee and the creature who created her. The hate inside me amplified. She didn’t want to go home. And even though she hadn’t told me, I knew there was a very strong reason as to why.
She wasn’t begging for his life.
She was begging for hers.
