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“I’ve been trying to figure out why I can’t connect with anyone else I’ve dated. It’s because I’m chasing the feeling I get with Gabriel.
“He gets me. He doesn’t just understand my quirks and lives with them, but he understands me. All of me. The truth is, that man has the ability to break me, Trina.” I look over to my son.
Story time is over and they are now doing the craft that goes along with the story. I turn back to Trina. “And I can no longer live that carelessly.”
A tear falls down her face. I think she finally understands why this thing with Gabriel is so complicated.
The night we met was insane, but I knew there was something different about him. We had a connection. Having him back in our lives even for such a short period of time has shown me that our connection is dangerous. I won’t say I’m in love with Gabriel, but I won’t lie as if there aren’t feelings there. Feelings that if I don’t manage will quickly turn into love. And loving Gabriel is not safe.
Trina pats her face with one of the napkins I didn’t rip up before leaning forward in her seat. She reaches across the table for my hand. I place it in her open palm.
“I’m going to say something to you that I never thought I’d ever say in my life. Friend,” She pauses as if she has to gather her thoughts. “You can’t sleep with that man.”
I chuckle but I know she’s being serious. She lets go of my hand.
“Seriously, I get what you’re saying. And adding sex to your already high emotions won’t help. It’s going to be hard friend, I know. But trust me, you can’t fuck him.”
I poke out my bottom lip. “Not even one last time for good measure?”
“No, bitch. You gotta go cold turkey.”
We both toss our head back and laugh. Even though we were joking about it, I know that she’s right. I have to keep things platonic between Gabriel and me. Which means, no more repeats of this morning no matter how much my body craves it.
We continue our Sunday tradition by ending our day with a trip to the park. That night, after putting Gabe to bed, I sat on the couch waiting for Gabriel to come home. I had a ton of plans to talk to him about why we couldn’t have sex again.
However, when he walked in, I took one look at him and knew that tonight wasn’t the night for that conversation.
Instead of talking, I pulled the cover back off my legs and patted the seat next to me. He dropped his duffle and sat down beside me.
“Rough night?” I ask.
“Yeah,” he says without further explanation.
“You want to talk about it?”
He turns to look at me. “No, I just want to sit in your presence.”
I fight the smile on my face. Without even trying, the man can always make me feel like I’m special, like I’m someone important to him. I bury myself in his side, taking in his warmth and scent. He wraps his arm around me pulling me in closer.
We spend the rest of the night cuddled up on the couch watching Game of Thrones.
chapter Thirty
The Ring
Beast
I stare down at my sleeping son. His face is pressed into my side, one arm thrown over my chest. Tonight, he wanted me to read him a story before bed and not Summer.
When Summer first made the requirements that I had to spend time with her and Gabe while I was here, I was terrified. I envisioned all the ways I would mess it up. Mother told me that I would hurt them. However, after weeks of being with them, it’s become a little easier.
I still have my fears, but each day I allow myself to stay in the moments with them. When I disappear, I will take these memories with me.
Slowly, I lift Gabe’s arm up and slide from under it. He rolls over on his stomach. I pause in my movement hoping he doesn’t wake up. He quickly settles and falls back to sleep. I stare at his face for a few moments.
“You sure did make one cute ass kid,” Priest hums in my head.
“On this I can agree. But even Lucifer was attractive,” Mother warns.
