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What would happen if I cut that line?
What if I refused to go back?
Would I float to the next life and leave my body to rot?
Would I be free of living in a place I didn’t want, struggling with feelings I couldn’t stop, and enduring things I wasn’t strong enough to survive?
You are strong enough.
You have to be.
You made a promise.
To Peter.
To them.
Get them out…
My golden light faded a little, allowing mortal sensations to enter my serenity.
Hands on my hips. Grunts in my ears. The faintest pressure as the beast who raped me reached his end.
Not yet.
Not yet.
I would go back.
I would finish what I started.
But not yet.
I flew higher into the stars as he spilled inside me. I stayed in the cosmos as his body withdrew from mine.
I didn’t know what happened for a while after that.
I stayed up there where it was quiet and safe.
Where no one else could reach me.
I wasn’t aware of Rachel whispering in my ear or someone picking me up.
The detachment grew stronger as I sank from the heavens and hovered near the ceiling of Victor’s bedroom.
I’d never experienced such a thing.
The projection of my consciousness as a separate entity.
My body draped like a broken bride’s in Henri’s arms.
Sweat glimmered on his temples.
His trousers done up, his shirt neatly tucked, his face carved from stone. He might stand like a man and smile like a friend, but nothing was inside him.
Broken.
Empty.
