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“I don’t know. It’s kind of cute, though. Not how naughty Kitten is, but the fact that they went out and got a dog together. They really should start training Kitten because I did see him jump on the island earlier and I’m pretty sure David is plotting our deaths.”
“Ourdeaths? What did I do?” I felt her lean into me and then I felt her pinky finger lightly brush against mine. Looking down at her, I watched as she pretended not to notice me staring at her. As subtle as she could be, she slowly interlaced our fingers. My pulse raced like she’d grabbed my dick. I felt nerves like I hadn’t since I was still a kid.
“You let them in. Which kind of makes me want to plot your death, too.” She held my wrist with her other hand as she turned and gazed up at me. “They’re a lot. I mean, they’re amazing, but they’re a lot. If you need to excuse yourself for work this is the one time I won’t give you hell about it.”
Butterflies. That’s what I was feeling. I swallowed down the urge to grumble about everything and made myself sit with the feelings. “Your parents are what every parent should be. They’re warm and open and so goddamn accepting. It’s so clear that they just want you to be happy.”
“My happiness comes second to grandchildren.” She rolled her eyes. “They’re going to be great grandparents, though. I’ve always wanted a big family and I guess I thought I’d be closer to having it than I am at twenty-seven. I know they thought they’d have little babies to smother by now.”
“Did you want a family with your ex?” I shouldn’t have asked, shouldn’t have cared, but I wanted to know how invested she’d been in the asshole.
“No.” She leaned forward and pressed her forehead to my chest. It was obvious she was exhausted from running interference with her parents all day. “I knew from the beginning that I didn’t want kids with him. I just… I thought being with him was better than being alone. I was wrong. I wasn’t even sad when I caught him screwing the upstairs neighbor. I was just kind of relieved.”
“I never really loved Angie.” I heard how harsh the words sounded and shook my head. “I mean… I tried. She was really good at bringing Jud out of his shell and I realize now that I was looking for a woman to love me in place of my mother. That’s a really stupid reason to marry someone, though. The first time I found out she cheated, I was hurt but not like I should’ve been. The next time, I just expected it.”
“How many times?”
I grimaced. “I don’t know. Dozens? More? I stopped reacting and caring after a while. We had Kendall to think about. I probably would’ve just let it keep going but it was starting to touch Kendall. Angie screwed one of the dads at Kendall’s school and the rumors weren’t great. I divorced her but nothing really changed. Our relationship had become something to trot out for events and nothing else. She didn’t even live with us by the end.”
Ada stood up on her toes and wrapped her arms around my neck to hug me. “What an idiot she was.”
When she moved away, I caught her hand and I was the one to intertwine our fingers that time. “I’m sure I wasn’t a walk in the park either.”
“What are you talking about? You’re great and I’ve never said anything otherwise.” She giggled and tugged me into the grass after her. “Do you ever want to get married again?”
“I always said I never would.” I looked out at where Kitten was sniffing around. “Who knows, though?”
“What about kids? Do you want more?”
“My nanny says I’m not a very good dad, so I don’t know…”
“You’re getting better.” Ada let go of my hand and gasped at something she saw in the yard. “Kitten! No!”
I looked out and saw what Ada was freaking out about. Kitten was trying to make friends with a skunk. I shouted at Ada to stop running at the skunk and at Kitten to get back but neither listened. Of course, neither listened.
An hour later, after the specialized groomer finished up with Kitten and Ada had been locked away in a baking soda bath, I thought about Ada’s kid question again. I took the stairs up to her room two at a time and let myself in.
I found her still in the bath, her knees pulled up to her chest and her eyes bright red from crying. Kneeling next to the tub, I dipped my hand in the water and winced at how cool the water had gotten. Silently, I drained some of the water and added more hot water and baking soda. The skunk smell was lingering.
Looking up at her, I saw she had giant tears pooling in her eyes. “Hey. What’s wrong?”
“You’re being so nice. And I stink. I got sprayed by a skunk and then I threw up on myself. And I think Kitten hurt the skunk. He stepped all over him. Do you think the skunk’s okay? Should we do something for it? Do you think I’m going to stink forever? Why are you being so nice?”
I smiled and poured soap onto a cloth. I started washing her arms first. “You’re not going to stink forever. Maybe for a few days, but not forever. The skunk is fine. I saw it run off and the only thing that looked hurt was its pride.”
She moved forward in the bath until she was face to face with me. “And why are you being so nice?”
I ran the cloth over her shoulders and the back of her neck. “I don’t know. Maybe you’ve bullied me into submission. Or maybe I want to take care of you. Does it matter?”
She wrapped her soap covered arms around my neck and nodded. “To me, it does.”
I searched her eyes and swallowed my nerves. “I want to take care of you. I want to make you smile and laugh and dance around because you’re so happy you can’t fucking contain it. I care… I care about you.”
Those giant tears fell and she hiccupped. “I’m sorry. Sometimes I hiccup when I cry.”
“Of course you do.” I turned my face to kiss her inner elbow. “Lean forward so I can wash your back, Ada.”
She did as I asked and she watched me as I took care of her with wide eyes and a rogue hiccup every so often. “I care about you, too.”
