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1
***Ada***
Icancatchmoreflies with honey. I could also catch a bear with honey.I gripped the counter that separated me from the rest of the diner and did my best to keep my smile in place. My mom’s constant reminder that I’d get as far as I wanted in life as long as I kept sweet played in my head but it was facing an uphill battle against the shitstorm of a day I was having.
On a scale from one to attacked by an ape at the zoo and publicly ridiculed for the ape having to be put down, I was climbing into that ape exhibit. I’d started my day counting pennies from my childhood piggy bank to have enough money to pay the water bill and then I’d quickly gone into finding my boyfriend cheating on me. It was so cliche that I wanted to scream. I didn’t scream, though, because I was a freaking ball of sunshine! Also, I probably didn’t scream because the relationship had run its course. I just didn’t know how to end it. Thankfully, Camden did. He’d ended it with a busty blonde who lived in the upstairs apartment. The only thing about it being her that really pissed me off was that she’d kept me awake so many nights by having loud sex right over my bed. It was just insulting that she’d ruined my sleepandslept with my boyfriend.Ex-boyfriend.
I’d grabbed a bag, shoved a few things inside, told Camden’s bare ass that I’d come back later to get the rest of my stuff, and I’d blown out of there. The water bill money was going straight back into my piggy bank. I had to find a new apartment. Or maybe just a room in someone else’s apartment. If I really had time to think about everything, I was lucky that Camden cheated on me. The water bill wasn’t the only thing that was about to get cut off at his apartment. Worse than that, the red notice taped to the front door had been there for a few days already and the apartment manager was only going to give so many eviction warnings before he actually made a move. Camden was probably going to be as homeless as I was soon. We’d both be searching for single rooms in someone else’s apartment.
That all had really set the pace for the rest of my morning, though. Even if I was okay with the relationship ending, being cheated on still stung. The sex that I’d walked into that morning had been a lot more vigorous than the sex I’d had with Camden. It left a nasty feeling nagging at the back of my brain that maybe I was the problem.
I was late to work and Henry, my boss, was on a warpath because the cook had called in sick and somehow, that was my fault. I’d been chewed out while I stood perfectly still, clutching my piggy bank to my chest because my car doors didn’t lock and I didn’t want to risk losing the little bit of money I had in the world. Henry was no fly, nor was he a bear. He was a tiny man with tiny man syndrome and no amount of honey from me changed that. He hated me. I secretly believed it was because I towered over him at my above-average height.
So, broke, cheated on, yelled out, and clutching a porcelain pig I’d named Pig-Pig, I considered myself to be having a really, really bad day. Life thought that was funny, though, and I was pretty sure it said ‘hold my beer’ before sending in the Carrington brothers.
Henry’s niece, Megan, normally waited on them. They were particular about how their breakfast was served, how long it took them to get it, the way the bill was left on their table, and even how long the waitress taking their order could stare at them without them getting cranky about it. Not that they ever really looked up from their phones to notice any of those things. It was like they just knew when something wasn’t exactly right. They had a Karen sixth sense and Megan had perfected the art of keeping them as happy as they seemed to be capable of getting.
The few times I’d waited on them, I’d had Henry barking orders in my ear like a Pomeranian, making sure I didn’t mess anything up. That morning, Henry was in the kitchen covering for the cook. I was on my own. I made it through taking their order, dropping their order off at their table, and I’d been on my way to setting their bill down when I noticed a dark scowl on the face of the oldest brother. Looking down at his plate, I saw that there was a hair clinging to the side of it. My stomach sank faster than an anchor.
I thumped the bill down harder than I meant to and practically ran back to the kitchen. I was struggling to stay positive when I looked at Henry, cooking without a hairnet, and waved my arms at him. “A hair!”
He frowned at me. “What?”
“There was a hair on one of their plates! A hair, Henry!” I tugged at my own hair, making it stand out more than it already was, and then pointed at it. “A hair. A human hair. On a Carrington brother’s plate.”
Henry’s face went white and I watched as he reached up to feel his head. No hairnet. He registered what I’d already seen, glanced over at my hair, and his jaw hardened. “It was obviously one of yours.”
I gasped. “Do you know how much product I have in my hair to keep it from growing to the size of a basketball, Henry? More than you can imagine. My hair doesn’t fall out until I brush it out at the end of the day.”
“It must’ve been yours.” He cleared his throat and wiped his hands. “Did you say anything to them?”
“No! I left the bill and came in here to tell you.” I pawed at my neck and grimaced, an expression not approved by the official Little Miss Sunshine committee, but I was breaking out in hives. I didn’t know what else could go wrong. Even the more positive spin I’d tried for earlier were souring. Camden’s cheating suddenly felt a lot worse.
“I’ll go speak to them. We can’t lose their business.”
I watched Henry leave and chewed at the corner of my thumb nail. The lore around the Carrington brothers was never-ending. I’d heard so much about them over the years. The main thing I’d heard was that messing up with them wasn’t an option. Waitresses better than me had vanished after spilling a few drops of their coffee on the table in front of them. If Henry blamed me for Hair-Gate, I was a goner.
Peeking out of the kitchen, I saw Henry speaking animatedly with his hands. He mostly blocked my view of the Carrington brothers with his movements but I could tell the oldest brother was staring at Henry, his face hard.
I waited for the gavel to fall and when it did, I was still surprised.
Henry slammed open the kitchen door and didn’t blink when it nearly took my head off. He glared up at me and bared his little teeth. “You’re fired.”
My mouth fell open. “What? But I didn’t do that, Henry. That wasn’t my hair and you know it.”
“I don’t give a shit. You should’ve noticed it. You’re fired and I never want to see you in this building again. If you cost us their business, I’ll find you and sue your ass.” He waved his hands like he could blow me out of his presence with the light breeze he created. “Out. Now.”
Just like that, something snapped in my brain. I could only keep smiling through so much. I patted Henry’s head, flicked the tip of his nose, and shouldered my way past him. I grabbed Pig-Pig, my purse, and a single dry pancake before stomping out to my car. The Carringtons were already gone, but I could see the back end of their fancy SUV and it filled me with rage. They’d cost another waitress her job and were just going to ride off into the morning sun without another thought? I didn’t think so.
2
***Ada***
ThefirsttimeI’dspotted the Carrington Estate, I was ten and had been standing on the other side of the lake, the side for tourists and ‘poors’. My parents had brought me on a weekend trip to splash around in Lake Dun and I hadn’t been able to stop staring at the mansion that overlooked the water. It was something straight out of one of my storybooks. I would’ve watched the house for hours if some teenager hadn’t pooped in the water as a joke. I’d left Lake Dun with conflicting feelings that day.
Part of the Carrington Lore was that their estate was guarded by men with giant guns who’d shoot on sight if you didn’t look nice enough to be there. I didn’t believe that rumor for a second. Another rumor was that the brothers lived there with an entire harem of women who just existed for their pleasure. That one I had a harder time discounting. Despite only ever seeing the top of their faces, I could attest to the fact that the brothers were…decent looking. If they’d ever taken their faces out of their phones, I might’ve even deemed them handsome.
One of my favorite rumors was that the brothers weren’t real. A bunch of local kids claimed to have scaled the fence surrounding the property and watched the brothers shapeshift from men into lizards. It was my favorite rumor because I loved the idea of the three of them hearing that people thought they were lizards. Maybe I’d held a little bit of a grudge against them even before they’d gotten me fired. Moving to Lake Dun as an adult meant I didn’t grow up with the Carrington Lore so everything just sounded…asinine. They strode through life like kings while everyone around them threw their jackets over puddles to make sure the men didn’t sully their perfect feet. It was gross.
