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“Oh my god.” Her cheeks heat, and she shakes her head, laughing despite herself. “I don’t think we should tell your parents about that one.”
“Yeah.” I cringe a little before I grin again. “Maybe we skip that one, but I’m more than happy to tell them about the others. Happy to fill Rob in on how much fun we’ve had this summer.”
“You’re evil.” She says it like an accusation, but the look in her eyes when she turns them to me makes my heart somersault in my chest. “But I appreciate you more than you know. The dates. This summer. What you did in there. All of it. I hope you know that.”
“I’m enjoying every second I get with you.”
“Me too. You’re a good one, Coop.” She studies my face, and I run my fingers down her jaw before I kiss her softly.
“You’re the good one. Thank you for coming here and putting up with all of this for Lizzy’s sake. I know she pressured you to come, and I’m sorry it means you have to deal with all of this.”
“It’s okay. I wanted to be here for her, and honestly, I—” she stops midsentence and looks up at me again and then shakes her head.
“Honestly, what?” I ask.
“I’ve gotten used to our little… routine, I guess? I think I would have missed you. That probably sounds silly.” She gives a little ground, and I feel my heart kick up in response.
“It doesn’t sound silly. I would have missed you too. I’m honestly secretly glad my kid twisted your arm.”
“Me too. And kind of glad you told everyone we’re dating so I can still kiss you.” She leans up on her tippy toes to kiss me again, and I wrap my arms around her, but her eyes suddenly flash with awareness. “Shit. What about Lizzy?”
“I’ll explain it to her later. I think she’s as suspicious of me and you as I am of her and Billy though, so I might be coming up on an inquisition soon anyway.”
“Well, I can’t say I envy you that.”
I kiss her one more time and then eye the door to the house when I see a figure moving in front of it. I can guess at least some of them have peered out to see what we’re doing down here.
“Think you’re ready to go back in?” I ask her softly after I kiss her one more time.
“Yes. I’m ready.” She holds out her hand for mine, and I take it, smiling at the fact that at least for a little while I get to pretend she’s mine in all the ways that count.
29
Beatrix
The next morning, I’m in the kitchen prepping the cupcakes for Lizzy’s birthday. Cooper and Rob’s parents have taken off with Lizzy and the rest of the kids for the day, shopping and hitting up some of her favorite places in town before they come back here for dinner. Her grandparents are making her favorite meal, and I promised to make cupcakes for her. Cooper is still in bed, and Rob and his fiancée are having a leisurely breakfast, so I’m up whipping batter together while I preheat the oven and soften the butter for the frosting.
I’m already feeling better than yesterday, but my heart is still piecing together exactly how to feel in the wake of all these revelations. It’s not that I want Rob back or that I still have dreams about getting married anymore. It’s the fact that they got engaged so quickly when it had taken Rob well over a year to even discuss the topic with me. That he’d dragged his feet even after we said we wanted to get married. That no ring ever materialized, and arguments over that, among other things, led to us breaking up and then repairing things more than once.
I wasted so much time on a man who wasn’t sure about me. A man who ultimately didn’t want me, and I feel foolish for having done it. For having stood by hoping for something more. Something I was never going to get. Especially when I can see how easily he was able to commit to someone when he was sure. It makes me wonder whether I was part of the problem rather than it just being a difference between what we wanted in life—if the same problems will haunt me in future relationships too.
“Bea?” Rob’s voice stops me mid-stir, and I’m thankful that I’ve managed not to actually cry while thinking about all this because the last thing I want is him thinking I’m shedding any tears over him.
“Yep?” I glance back over my shoulder to let him know I heard him.
I heard the back door that leads down to the water open and shut a few minutes ago, and I thought maybe he and Carly had gone out for the day.
“Can we talk for a minute?”
Fuck. I do not want to talk, but I don’t want to look petulant either.
“Sure.” I stop the mixer and wipe my hands on my apron as I turn to him.
“I’m sorry about last night. It was a little spontaneous. She was excited. I was hoping to warn you first when I saw you here.”
“You don’t owe me a warning. We’ve been over for a while.”
“I know but… it’s awkward with you being here. I didn’t know Cooper was bringing you along.”
