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“Oh sweetie. I thought I was making the right decision at the time. I was young and scared,” she admits.
“I get that. I do. But you could have contacted him at any point in the last twenty-five years and told him, or called just to find out it was safe. I didn’t have to live my whole life thinking my father didn’t want me,” I spit with my anger rising.
She sighs sadly. “I know. If I could go back and change it, I would. I missed your father so much. My heart broke every day. There were some days where I wasn’t sure I could make it through without him, and the only thing that kept me going was you. You were the only piece I had of him.”
“I wouldn’t have been the only thing if you hadn’t been a coward,” I snap.
“I know,” she says with her voice cracking.
“Today was great, but it also showed me how much I had missed out on,” I say as a sob slips out.
“I’m sorry,” my mother says while pulling me into her arms.
“We will get through this,” she mumbles.
“I want to stay. I’m not sure how long yet, but I don’t plan on leaving any time soon,” I tell her.
She pulls back and smiles at me. “I’m going to stay. I think it’s time to finally come home.”
“There are my girls!” a voice shouts, and we both look to see my dad walking over to us with a grin. The grin falls when he sees us both with tear streaks on our faces.
“What’s wrong?” he asks while pulling us into his arms and looking around for any threats.
“Nothing, we were just talking. Getting a few things off my chest,” I tell him.
“Everything good?” he asks hesitantly.
“I want to stay for awhile to get to know you, and my mom said she is ready to come home,” I say.
His eyes widen at my words, and he looks at my mom with a determined expression on his face. “If you think I wouldn’t chase after you if you left me again, then you are mistaken.”
“I know, honey,” she says while smiling softly at him.
“I couldn’t find you before, but nothing will stop me a second time. Even if I have to handcuff you to me,” he says with a grin.
That look is too much for me. I fight a gag. “Okay, that was not something I needed to hear,” I say, stepping back and shivering in disgust.
They both laugh at me, and I don’t mind. There is a lightness in their eyes that calms me. The serenity they both give off is comforting. I don’t ever remember my mom being this peaceful.
I hope this feeling lasts for them both.
Zane
Tonight, Zeke and I decide to stay at the club and have a few drinks. He plans on leaving in a week. I hate to see my brother go, but I know he has a life where he is living.
We haven’t had much time together. Hopefully, he visits more often.
“Do you really need to leave?” I ask after taking a drink of my beer.
He nods his head reluctantly. “Yeah, I have… someone special back home. I need to get back to them.”
“Really? You never mentioned anyone,” I tell him.
“I haven’t really had the time,” he says, nervously rubbing the back of his neck.
“I can’t wait to meet her, if she’s that important to you,” I tell him honestly.
He gets a pained look in his eyes but nods his head. “One day. Hopefully they will want to come here. I want to move back, but there is some shit I need to take care of first.”
