Page 48 of Be With Me


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Fear.

An antsy, itchy feeling lingered while I spent several hours in the cool, silent library. I shouldn’t have called Erik a dick. Not because he wasn’t one, because he was, but the fear that had filled Debbie’s eyes reminded me of myself.

No one had ever called Jeremy a dick. At least not to his face, but if they had, he would’ve blamed me, and I bet Erik blamed Debbie. And for that I felt terrible.

Realizing I had no idea what I read in the last chapter, I scrubbed my palms down my cheeks. Studying was pointless right now. The words had blurred together. The food chain and ecosystem breakdown made no sense when it should.

I snapped the text shut and glanced across the empty tables. There wasn’t a single soul on the second floor. Sighing, I dug my cell out of my bag. No missed calls or texts. Of course not. Why had I even looked? Wasn’t like I expected Jase to contact me or wanted him to.

I was such a terrible liar.

When I finally worked up the nerve to go back to my dorm, our suite was empty. Debbie’s bed was tidy. Nothing was broken or out of place, but I wasn’t surprised. Erik hadn’t thrown a destructive temper tantrum yet. Jeremy never had.

It was eight before I decided to hop in the shower and get ready for the party. Part of me wanted to bail, but it was the first party I’d been invited to, and I was either going, facing the possibility of having to deal with Jase, or staying home and feeling sorry for myself.

I opted with leaving the pity party behind for the evening.

And going to the party was a good opportunity to prove to myself that I was done with Jase—that I could be around him without flailing.

After drying my hair, I tugged it up in a loose bun and pulled on a pair of black leggings. The cute shirt was out of the picture, so I settled on a long, loose polka-dotted blouse and my favorite, worn-way-too-much denim skirt. As I slid my feet into a pair of flats, my phone chirped.

Slipping my cell into my back pocket along with my key card, I took a deep breath and then headed out. Tonight will be fun. Tonight will be normal. I would be like any other almost nineteen-year-old heading out to a party. I would have fun.

Parked at the curb, Cam was behind the wheel of Avery’s car. As I trotted up to the back door, Cam was pulling back from the passenger seat, where Avery sat with cheeks as pink as Valentine’s Day cards.

I climbed in the back, grinning. “I’ll be amazed if you guys make it out of college without having procreated a soccer team’s worth of kids.”

Avery’s brown eyes widened. “Oh, God, no . . .”

I laughed, buckling myself in as Cam’s eyes appeared in the rearview mirror. I gave him a big smile. “What? No kids?”

“Ah, not in the near future,” he replied.

“But that means you guys have thought about it?” I wondered if Jase had ever considered wanting kids with Jack’s mother? Probably not when they were sixteen, but in the future.

Avery’s cheeks were now red. “Not really. I mean, that’s really serious. Not that we’re not serious.” She patted Cam’s arm when he returned his gaze to her. She twisted around, grinning. “Anyway, you look really cute. Love the shirt.”

“Thank you. So do you.” And she did, dressed in jeans and a pretty green shirt that complemented her coloring perfectly. “How many people are going to be at the party?”

“Not many,” Cam answered, spinning the wheel. “It’s not one of their big ones. You’re probably going to be bored.”

“She’s not going to be bored.” Avery grinned. “Jacob had to back out, but Brit is coming.”

I relaxed against the seat in spite of the twisty motion my stomach was doing. “That’s cool.”

“Is Ollie coming?” she asked Cam.

A smile crossed my lips. I’d met Ollie, Cam’s old roommate a few times. He’d graduated in the spring and while I hadn’t known him well, I knew enough.

“I think he might be showing up later.” Cam reached over, finding Avery’s hand without looking, and threading his fingers through hers.

I focused my gaze on the window, a little uncomfortable. Not because they were touchy-feely—and they were always touchy-feely—but because there was a little green-eyed bitch that lived in the pit of my stomach. I shouldn’t be jealous of them.

Shaking my head, I cleared my throat. “What is Ollie going to grad school for again?”

“Med school.”

My eyes widened. “Are you serious? Holy crap. I didn’t think he was . . .” Um, how did I say this nicely? “I thought he smoked away most of his brain cells.”

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