AllFreeNovel
Share Us
He knows I never had that either. My father stopped paying child support as soon as he was legally able and he didn’t always make the payments before that.
Dell isn’t in a place where he’ll be able to hear that, though. “I’m doing what I can, but it’s going to take time.”
“I’ll be checking in until you have it for me.” He spins on his heel and runs full tilt into the darkness. He’s breathing so hard I can hear it from here.
***
For once, I’m glad when the kitchen is empty, and the house is silent. Cupping a hand over my cheek, I slip off my shoes by the back door and hurry through the house, my socked feet slipping on the smooth hardwood floors.
I sprint up the spiral staircase and down the hall to my room, darting inside and closing the door gently behind me.
A sigh leaves me and I start to shake, the adrenaline of what just happened hitting me for the first time. My body’s finally releasing the fear that’s been a tight knot held inside since Dell pinned me against the barn wall.
My body never responds first with fear. It’s always fight mode for me. Fight and never let them see any emotion from me other than mocking amusement. It’s saved me more times than I can count.
Cowards always think I have some surprise weapon up my sleeve when I show no fear.
I wrap my arms around myself and slide down the closed door to sit on my soft, carpeted floor. It’s not the first time I’ve had this feeling, but it’s the first time I’ve had it alone.
I breathe slow and deep, hearing my father’s calming words in my head. Just breathe, Honey Bear. Nothing can hurt you here.
It was a rare moment of tenderness from my father. At once, one of my worst memories and one of my best.
Once the shaking has stopped and I’ve caught my breath, I flip the light switch to illuminate my sanctuary. Most people would probably be surprised by just how pink and fluffy my room is. My black hair and piercings and tattoos are my outer shell, the hardness that deflects trouble before it starts.
My room is my marshmallowy center no one gets to see. Not ever. My sisters would see it, but we’ve had no heart-to-hearts in here, no movie montage girls’ night of spa treatments and movies.
It’s just me and my room filled with pastels and soft materials. No florals, just comforting colors and fabrics. The coziest place on earth.
The floor is hardwood, but I’ve covered it with overlapping area rugs with a high pile and in varying shades of green. I pull off my socks and let my bare feet sink into the softness as I cross the room to my en-suite bathroom.
My cheek is already swelling.
“Damn it, Dell.” I splash cold water on the bruise. This is definitely going to leave a mark. As a reminder of this awful day and worse night.
“Such a fuckup.” I stare at myself in the mirror. I’m trying. I’m really trying to get it right, but I feel like I’m swimming upstream in the wrong direction.
I don’t wear a lot of make-up and doubt what I have will hide the incipient bruise, so I make up a story as I head downstairs to get something to eat.
I’m halfway through a dinner of leftovers when Goldy walks into the kitchen. She’s laughing with Daisy about something.
They stop when they see me, eyes going wide. “What happened?” Goldy asks.
I smile to ease her worry. I’m over my shakes, but the sick feeling in my gut still lingers.
My two worlds are colliding, and I have no way to stop it. Other than to find the damn money and get Dell out of here.
“It’s nothing. I tripped over the pitchfork and kissed a stall door with my face.”
Goldy crosses the room and kneels next to me, her expression as concerned as it was when I was a little girl and I skinned my knee or fell out of a tree. She cups my cheek and looks into my eyes. “Any headache or nausea?”
I almost want to lie to her, just so she’ll tuck me into bed and sit with me, keeping me awake in case I have a concussion. “No headache. No nausea. I’m good enough for an impromptu band practice tonight, since you and Daisy are here.”
Her slow blink is all the answer I need. “I’ve got a chapter to write this evening. I’m sorry.”
“Sure.” I turn to Daisy. “You up for it?”
Daisy, to her credit, meets my gaze and doesn’t wince. “I’ve got an early morning meeting, but I could play for a little while.”
