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“It is a good idea.”
“Victoria.”
“You don’t want me anymore?”
I grind my teeth as I retrieve my shorts and pull them on, grabbing for my shirt and heading toward the door. “That’s not it. I want you so much.”
“Then stop.”
I do, hand resting on the handle.
“Just follow the plan.”
“Vic—"
“Nope.” She’s on her feet now, gathering up her clothes. “Whatever that was, it was incredible. We are doing that again. Right away. Bigger. Better. There’s something here.”
“You are a child.”
“I am not a child.”
“You are an employee.”
“I am not an employee.”
“You deserve better.”
“I…wait, what does that even mean?”
I shake my head. “I can’t give you what you need.”
“What I need is one more night of getting railed while I pretend to try to get away. Can you give me that? Full on. It’ll be fun. Do you know what fun is?”
I shake my head slowly.
Victoria pulls her tight pants on and rolls her eyes in frustration. “Well, what we just did, that was fun.”
She pulls on her tight pastel sports top.
“It was fun,” I say without conviction.
“But?”
“But I just worry.”
“Well, you don’t have to worry about me. I have literally spent my entire dating career being told by guys that they aren’t interested in anything serious and taking whatever meager scraps of time they have to throw at me. I’ll be fine.”
“I’m sorry, what?” I flashback to all the times Ainsley has brought girls around only to flinch at my referring to them as girlfriends. He would tell me it wasn’t anything serious. That they were just hanging out. The thought that those girls were just putting up with his behavior because they thought they didn’t deserve anything better turns to bile in my stomach.
I shake my head to clear the image of my son. He’s the last person I want to be thinking about when locked in a public changing room with a woman closer to his age who I just completely and utterly violated. “All the more reason for this to end. I don’t want to contribute to any ideas you may have about your self-worth being tied to your sexuality.”
She laughs. Actually fucking laughs.
And once she starts, she can’t seem to stop.
After a few moments of watching her crack up to the point of tears in her eyes, I can’t help but start to smile myself.
And then I laugh.
