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Please God, let him survive.
Chapter 4
Thea
I miss you. Come home.
I stare at Deke’s text and shake my head.
I’ve been home a month now, and I still have no idea what I’m doing. I know I’m not ready to go back to New York. I also have no desire to speak to Deke right now. When I told Dom that Deke was the first man I've truly cared for since my crush on him, I wasn't lying. It’s the truth. What I didn’t tell Dom is that Deke has changed since joining med school. He’s stressed all the time. He’s short tempered with me and everything I do seems to be the wrong thing. Two days before I came home, he slapped me because I got mad at him for screaming at me because I forgot to start the dishwasher the night before.
I mean, I know it’s nasty—that’s a given. Still, I had been on my leg all day, packing up my apartment. I was in so much pain, I had to take the prescription medicine that the doctor gave me. I could barely keep my eyes open, so I went to bed. I thought I had pushed start, but I obviously didn’t.
Until that point, Deke had never gotten physical with me. Verbally belittling when he was upset did happen, but he never hit me. I haven’t spoken to him since and I’m not sure I want to again. I asked him not to contact me until I had time to think things through. It doesn’t surprise me that he is ignoring what I want. Now that I think back on our relationship, he always ignored what I wanted when it didn’t align with his own wants and needs.
I sigh and shut my phone off. I love being back in Kentucky, but I’m exhausted with life. Luckily, Thomas made a full recovery. If something happened to him, I’m not sure any of us would have survived. T is the heart of our family. He doesn’t realize that, of course. He can’t see how special he is, or how much the family depends on and cares for him. I haven’t checked on Dom since I left the hospital that day when we had the intense conversation in the elevator. I wanted to, but I have enough trouble with men right now.
I mutter under my breath as I think once more about Deke. I probably need to change my number. If Mom and Dad ask why, I can always tell them it’s because I need a new local number for Kentucky now. Finding an apartment needs to move to the top of my list. I love my parents, but living with them is not something I want to keep doing—especially if I’m not going to return to New York.
I could live with Mattie. He has a two-bedroom house he lives in part of the time—preferring that to staying at the club some nights. It’s empty often. The problem is that when it’s not, there’s a lot of club guys there. One of those guys happens to be Dom. I haven’t heard from him since T was in the hospital. It disappoints me a little and I know that’s crazy. I shouldn’t give a damn what Dom does.
“Hey, Champ.”
I roll my eyes at Mattie as I finish walking up the sidewalk that leads to his house. He’s leaning on the front door and smiling.
“You know I hate that name, right?” I laugh as I take in my brother. I wasn’t kidding when I said he was huge. He towers over me and I’m a tall girl. His body is so massive that I think it would make three of me. His dark brown hair has a red tint with the sun shining down on him. The mischievous sparkle in his green eyes and familiar smile always feel like home. Mattie and I have always been close. I love Skylar, but my younger sister isn’t easy to get close to. My brother says it’s because our parents spoiled her. I’m not sure that’s it. They spoiled me, too. Skylar just approaches things more analytically than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s unnerving.
Mattie shrugs. “The name fits you better than the one Dad gave you.”
“I guess I can’t argue that,” I laugh as I walk into his waiting arms. He hugs me close as I breathe in his scent with a sigh. Mattie taught me how to fight. I can take down most men. I can’t quite give Mattie a run for his money, but I could do enough damage to get away if my life depended on it—even with a bum leg. My brother helping me learn self-defense after my accident is a big part of the reason that I found a way out of the pain and grief that hit me after the injury. Without Mattie, I’m not sure I’d be standing here today. I was quickly on my way to becoming a shell before he held me up. “Plus, it’s better than the one you gave Skylar,” I joke, hoping to lighten the mood.
“Well, she earned her nickname,” he mutters, and I slap him playfully.
“She’s still growing up.”
“I hope so,” he adds, and I decide to change the subject. Skylar and Mattie are oil and water.
“You’re staying here tonight, right?”
“Definitely. Do you know I heard Mom and Dad having sex last night? I may never be the same again.”
“They got louder after you and Skylar both moved out. I made the mistake of staying there one night before I bought my house.”
“That’s why I’m here tonight. I’m not sure I can look at them right now.” Mattie laughs, and I take a moment to revel in the sound. “I actually was hoping you could help me.”
“Whatcha’ need?”
“I’m going to look at some apartments this week. The ones tomorrow and Wednesday I can look at myself, but I’d appreciate it if you could go with me once I get the places narrowed down. I trust you to tell me if I’m overpaying.”
“You got enough money, Thea? I can?—”
“I’m good. Most of the money I made in New York, I didn’t spend. “Mom and Dad gae me the money they save for my college to live on. I’m pretty frugal and it’s just me, so I still have most of that, too.”
“Okay, but I’m here, you know?”
“I do. I’m good. I just need to regroup and figure out what I’m going to do. The only thing I’m sure of right now, is that I don’t want to go back to New York.”
“How does Deke feel about that?”
