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Why couldn’t he just give up on me like everyone else? Damn him, and damn me for even caring. I heard the telltale pop of someone portalling in behind me and stood, turning toward the approaching footsteps.
“Forget something? Or maybe you want to start another pointless argument…”
My words died as Neverra appeared in the entryway.
Alone.
“Hi.”
Fifty-One
Dianna
“What are you doing here?”
“Hi to you too.” Neverra smiled. The long black pantsuit she wore clung to her curves faithfully. The train of her jacket flared behind her as she stepped inside. It had gold accents across the shoulders, the pads beneath making her seem larger, and the buttons created intricate designs along each side. These had to be her council garbs.
“Where’s Logan?” I asked, looking behind her. “I doubt he would leave you alone after everything.”
She walked past me, heading toward the main room, her hands clasped in front of her. “I snuck out. Hopefully, he hasn’t realized I am gone. I needed to talk to you, and once I saw Samkiel’s light touch down at the council hall, I figured you would be alone.”
An understatement.
“Wow. You guys are fast.”
“Light travels quickly.”
“Cool. What do you want?” I folded my arms and squared my shoulders. “If you think that just because I saved you and Logan, we are going to be best friends, you’re wrong. I’m already regretting that mistake. I—”
“I like the place, although he’s made it into a castle.” She cut me off as she wandered around the room. She slid her hand along the arm of the couch where he had slept. “He made it as comfortable as he could, huh? When Logan first met me, he used to do the sweetest things, too. Gods court just as the mortals do. It’s usually small things, gifts or flowers. They have this overwhelming urge to take care of those they fancy. Of course, they are also overprotective and overbearing. Logan is no different. None of the celestials are. He tried everything when we first met, but I wouldn’t give him the time of day. He, like the rest of them, had a reputation back then. Everyone called them The Untouchables. They would take lovers, but no one could get close to them. So I avoided Logan and his advances. That was until Samkiel decided he needed guards and held open competitions for The Hand. So many tried, and so many failed.”
I returned to the window seat, my body aching with fatigue. I wasn’t sure why Neverra was sharing all of this with me, but it was better than being alone with my thoughts.
“I made it through that round of competitions, and then so did Imogen. I gained so much I didn’t even know I needed. A family, a home, and then, of course, Logan.” She smiled, wiping her hands on her dark robe.
“Why are you telling me this?”
Her face twisted in pain. “Because I know you lost yours.”
“Leave.” The word was sharp and blunt. My lip lifted in a snarl, and my heart thudded in my chest, the uncomfortable pounding uncontrolled without him here to calm it. Anger and pain bubbled just beneath the surface, but no fire danced across my hands, and my fangs failed to appear. No power remained in me. I stood, intending to leave the room, but she was suddenly in front of me. Had they always moved that damn fast?
“I’m sorry. Dianna, I am not trying to upset you. I swear.”
“Then what are you trying to do?”
Neverra swallowed hard and looked down at her hands, picking at her freshly painted nails and fiddling with her rings. The fierce warrior seemed nervous and unsure. When she lifted her head to look at me again, the shine of unshed tears filled her eyes. “I’m trying to tell you that I tried to save her. I did. Logan and I cared about Gabriella. We were meant to be just her guards, but she was so sweet and funny. She forced those silly, cute movies on us and told us stories of places you two have been. It was fun and reminded me so much of how life used to be before Rashearim fell. She loved you so much, which I know you know. I am just so sorry I couldn’t do more. I blame myself more than you know.”
My heart hurt so badly that it felt like it was knotting in on itself. “Why?”
Her hands dropped to her sides, and she sighed. “It was my fault. Samkiel told us to stay in that condo, but she got so bored. There were only so many games to play or movies to watch, and she missed you, missed Rick. She just wanted to go out for a few minutes. She wanted a coffee. I invited Rick over, and then Drake showed up. A part of me didn’t trust him, but I thought it was fine. I didn’t see or feel them until it was too late. We were trained to think logically and secure the best course of action in dangerous situations. I could have fled and gotten the others, but I didn’t want her to be alone. I was supposed to protect her.”
I tried to swallow back the rising grief, my eyes burning and nose stinging as tears threatened me, too. Hearing how she tried to save my sister and how much she cared for her broke me.
“It’s not your fault.”
Neverra’s eyes went wide in surprise. I think she expected me to lash out or scream at her, but it seemed I was burning out in more ways than one.
“I was the one who brought her into this wretched world when she almost died the first time. If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s mine. I damned us both.” I hadn’t admitted that to anyone.
