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“It’s not that.” An idea had formed in my mind, but I didn’t want to talk to one of them without the other. “Can we call Mac so I can talk to both of you at the same time?”
“Of course,” Bash murmured.
I dialed Mac—who picked up on the first ring—and mustered every ounce of courage I could find in my body.
“Hey Mac. I’m on here with Bash—”
“Hey Bardot.” Mac’s bright voice lit up my core, and I glanced at Bash.
Bash grunted, but cleared his throat when he saw my face. “Hey Mac.”
“Can we FaceTime?”
“Absolutely. Any chance I have to see that beautiful face—”
Bash rolled his eyes, and I smacked him as the FaceTime ring cut Mac off for a second.
“Be nice,” I ground out.
And then Mac’s cheerful smile filled my screen. My heart skipped, and I glanced from him to Bash. Bash—Bash, who actually wanted me—made my heart skip, too.
I wasn’t a praying person, but I sent up a prayer—I’m not sure to who considering the request—and hoped they’d be on board.
“I had such a great time last night,” Mac said.
Bash rolled his eyes again, and I was thankful he was out of frame.
“Me too,” I breathed. My dreams had been filled with karaoke duets that turned into a lot more.
My cheeks burned as I thought of the best part of that dream. Something I was hoping to turn into a reality.
Both men at the same time.
But as I looked at Bash, I knew he wouldn’t go for it in a million years.
“What is it, sweetheart?” Mac’s curious gaze left me breathless.
And beside me, Bash was steady and solid, despite the undercurrent of confusion and annoyance from talking to Mac. Despite the irritation, he was calm for me.
They both brought something to the table. I needed both of them, even if it wasn’t at the same time.
Judging from the tension radiating off Bash, separate was definitely the best route.
“I just left a long-term relationship, and I wasn’t ready for anything serious—and then I met you, Mac.”
He grinned and nodded toward Bash. “So why’s he here?”
I bit the corner of my mouth, my insides still warm from the kiss we shared. The two best kisses of my life had happened within twenty-four hours, and I was dazed by the connections I shared with them.
I could ask for what I wanted. I knew it was safe with Bash—and Mac was easy-going enough.
But if this didn’t work—I could lose both of them. The fear of that gripped me until I couldn’t breathe. But I couldn’t choose. I needed both of them.
Choosing was impossible.
“What is it, Em?” Bash pressed his hand to my lower back, and I sighed against his touch.
This was all I had ever wanted. To know Bash wanted me back was intoxicating and lovely, but it was a day too late. I wrestled with the dilemma of turning one of them down and I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t choose.
