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A lopsided smile pricks at his expression. “What’s wrong, sweetheart? Worried about me?”
Yes. That was the problem. He continues, “I was lucky because one of my father’s men intervened and put them down. By the time I woke up after surgery my father had already busted their club and wiped the family out. Still to this day, my biggest regret is not being a part of it. I promised myself to never be in that situation again. That’s when my father decided to move us here permanently, instead of coming back and forth on his business trips.”
I wonder how that impacted him and his brother without a mother. Never a place to call home until they were dumped here. Perhaps their father moved them here because it had been such a close call. Perhaps even in a world like this, their family cared for one another to some degree despite their violent nature.
That notion made me all the more of an asshole as I plotted to drive a wedge deeper between him and his brother.
I am growing attached to Luca and although he imposes himself into my life, I am finding it harder to push him away and he is distracting me because of it. He needs to go, and it is the only way I could think of.
I can’t leave the country and flee even if I wanted to, shackled by my own father’s restraints of not being able to get a passport. So, I need to provoke old wounds. Luca has to be gone and his second in charge, Ivan back.
Luca’s staring at me expectantly. Like he often does when I find myself slipping into a tangent of thoughts.
“What’s it like?” I ask curiously as he turns my back to him and lathers the soap down my back and begins to knead out the muscles. “To kill someone?”
“Be careful, sweetheart. Curiosity is a dangerous thing. Are you planning on killing me?”
“Don’t you think if I were going to, I would’ve tried already by now.”
I sense the laziness in his tone but there’s also a little bite in it—a reminder of the difference between us. “Not necessarily. Depending on the reason or revenge some prefer to play with their prey first.”
That sits with me like a weight. Luca is in many ways a brilliant man. A scary typhoon. But also this tenderness he shows me now doesn’t match up to either of those things. I wonder if that’s because he’s toying with his prey even now.
Luca continues. “The first time I killed someone I didn’t feel much. Rather, empty actually. Then I was overcome with guilt because I felt like I needed some exasperated emotion in the wake of what I’d just done. But I came to the realization after the initial shock that I felt powerful. I’m sure it’s different for everyone but some come to enjoy it even. The high of absolute domination and power. It feels like playing god.”
A cold shudder runs through me. His confession and sin, guilt free. I twist to look up at him. “Do you…enjoy it Luca?”
“Yes.” No hesitation. No lies. “If the person deserves it and has tried anything against me or my empire. Then yes. But I don’t kill without reason. It always has a message.”
I’m nervous to ask my next question but it falls from my lips. “Have you ever let anyone go?”
His gaze darkens and we can both sense the underlying question. Because the reality is the same man massaging me is most likely going to be my grim reaper as well.
“I have not,” he says with a lethal edge.
As expected. I make sure to not show any sign of weakness or discomfort. I’ll be free of this man soon enough. However, to do that, I need to use this intimacy against him. I need to tether slightly more on his trust.
“I want you to call off the man you have following me every day. It’s suffocating me.”
He seems bemused by the change in topic and my request. “No. Who knows what mischief you’ll get up to otherwise.”
“Luca, I have a life here as well.”
“One you fabricated to get closer to me,” he counters. He’s not entirely wrong. “You do realize, it’s for your safety as well, don’t you?”
“My safety?” I ask suspiciously.
“Not everyone is my friend here in New York. Our public association makes you a potential target.”
A cold shudder runs down me. I can only imagine what type of people might aim for some kind of weakness in Luca’s armor. Weakness. I almost slap myself. As if I am that valuable to him.
“I want them called off, Luca.” I harden my resolve.
He considers me. “What do I get out of it?”
I’m shocked he’s even contemplating it. I just need to push a little more. “I don’t think I should really be offering anything in return for my born given right of freedom.”
“It’s a cheap world, sweetheart, and anything can be bought or taken.”
