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Oh, yeah? What's the plan?
Okay, fine. I didn't have a plan, but I did have a life. And he couldn't just make me come and think I’d go back to pretending everything was fine. I didn't trust him to not hurt me again and didn’t know if I’d ever be able to.
What if I just stayed in the bathroom and hid? That could work, right? I wouldn't have to go anywhere then. I mean, was he really going to break down the bathroom door? Yes, of course, he would. Besides, I wasn't exactly the kind of person who hid. It was better to just get things over with.
I opened the door and found him with his tie unknotted, staring out my window."You should have asked for a better view,” he said.
"I didn’t want a better view."
He pressed his lips together. "You can’t see anything but the walls of other buildings."
"Yes, and that's fine. I don't need a penthouse. I don't need anything. They could have stuck me in a cubicle for all I cared. But even though I’m new and a flex employee, they gave me an office. You didn't have to do the guilt thing."
He frowned. "Guilt thing?"
"Look, I know the only reason my schedule is flexible and I actually even have an office, one with a bathroom, no less, was likely because you made that happen. And I was angry enough to allow it. I wasn't just going to walk away. I have a team of people I made a promise too. I want to see them settled. I want to see this software through. It’s my baby. When I’ve met my obligations and delivered the software, I can walk away."
His brow furrowed as his gaze searched mine. "I won’t let you do that."
"You keep saying that, Atticus, but you don't have any choice. This is my life. And you threw me away. You forfeited that right."
"I'm sorry, Gwen."
His gaze roamed over me, locking on my breasts. I kept thinking about what he'd said he was going to do to me, and I had to press my thighs together again.
Fuck me.
My libido shouted, Yes, yes, fuck me.
No, stupid libido.
I sighed. "Whatever this was, Atticus, it can't happen again. I don't know if I can trust you."
For a long moment, he studied me, the silence held between us in its fragile crystalline form. When he spoke again, his voice was raw. "Gwen, just try. Please, try. I know I don't have any right to ask for you back, but I cannot walk away from you. I've been back and forth between here and New York for weeks, just to see you from afar, to make sure that you're eating, and breathing, and drinking, but you're fucking not. I found these in your desk drawer."He pulled my stash of gummy bears out of his pocket. "You promised."
Despite myself, a laugh tumbled out. "You're a snoop."
He shrugged. "Well, I had to know if you’d replaced me. Have you replaced me?" The tension around his mouth was unmistakable.
"You don't get to ask that, Atticus."
The muscle in his jaw ticks. "I know, okay? I get it. But you and me, we're not done."
I stared at him. "You're not going to stop, are you?"
He gave me a narrow-eyed look. "No. I will guard you myself in your apartment. In your bedroom. When you have a nightmare, it'll be me who holds you. Not Lakewood."
I should have been shocked that he knew that, but I wasn't. What I did want to know was how he knew that. "Were you watching me… inside my room?"
He swallowed hard. "I have some cameras on the property. You have a tendency to not close your blinds, love."
I stared at him. "I know you’ve been keeping tabs on me, but don’t you think that’s going too far? Maybe a little creepy even?"
Atticus’s voice pitched low when he said, "I’m not a psycho stalker. Tell me, just now, did you like it?"
I swallowed hard. "That's not the point, Atticus."
"I do think that’s part of the point. It matters to me. If there's something you want, something you like, it's my job to give it to you."
