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I heard the guys laughing their asses off as I plundered deeper into the snow. I found a bank where the wind had swept a little pile up against a ledge, and I took the plunge, going knee-deep into it.
“There,” I declared, raising my fist. “Are you all happy now?”
“We’re overjoyed,” Sawyer called out. “Now get your ass back over here.”
“No, no,” I teased as I looked back at them, warm and cozy in their clothes on the little brick patio. “It’s nice out here. You should all come join me in your underwear.”
“It’s a good thing we’re the only sorry fucks staying here tonight,” Charlie said as I tromped back over to the patio.
“Fuck, it’s somehow worse now that I’m out of the snow,” I said. “It’s wet and cold and good God I need to hop into a warm shower.”
“Come on,” Sawyer said. “Back to my room. I’m about ready to pass out, anyway.”
“What about truth or dare?” Chase protested, clearly disappointed.
“Oh, I’m not anywhere near done,” Charlie said. “Jax, are you down?”
“You know I am,” he told Charlie.
“You guys have fun,” Sawyer told them. “Don’t do anything we wouldn’t do. Nothing that’s going to threaten someone’s life, okay?”
“Roger that,” Jax said, winking at us.
“Shower. Me. Cold. Wet,” was all I said, the shivers starting to overtake me.
Sawyer grabbed my pile of clothes and boots in one hand and took my arm with the other. “Come on upstairs. There is a very nice hot shower awaiting you.”
The Jade River Inn was old-school, but in the best way possible. I could tell the staircase was probably made of hemlock and kept beautifully stained a rich, dark color. I hadn’t had all that much to drink tonight, but the little jaunt into the snow had caused me to feel a little delirious when I was already sleep-deprived enough after the week I’d had.
I felt like I was walking through a dream as Sawyer guided me up the staircase that led to the second-floor landing, then up another that led to the third floor. Sawyer had scored the nicest room in the inn tonight.
“That bed,” I said, “looks like the coziest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”
“It really does,” Sawyer agreed.
It was covered in a big plush comforter and sheets that looked softer than anything I’d ever slept in. On the far side of the bed, another pair of paned double doors led out to a private terrace, which was currently being coated in snow. The attached bathroom had a porcelain tub and a big marble-tiled standing shower.
“Yes,” I said. “The promised land.”
“I’ll hop in after you,” Sawyer said as he pulled the handle to let the piping hot water flow out. “Don’t hog all the hot water.”
I groaned as I felt the steam hit my skin. “You can just hop in with me. This thing’s huge.”
“You sure that’s ok?”
I met his eyes. In my delirious state, I’d almost forgotten the events of the last couple of weeks. For most of our friendship, Sawyer and I hadn’t batted an eye at the idea of sharing a shower. We’d had to do it at the farm all the time, in the dinky little outdoor shower that was attached to one of the barns. We’d also done it while camping, and a couple of times at my place after particularly bad alcohol-soaked nights.
It had never felt weird. Not once.
But now, when I saw the flash in Sawyer’s eyes, I remembered how quickly everything had changed.
“I fucking hate that,” I blurted out, not bothering to filter myself.
He furrowed his brow. “Hate what?”
“I need us to be us again,” I told him. “You can shower with me, Sawyer. It’s not weird.”
He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. He paused for a moment before looking back up at me and giving me a resolute nod.
“You’re right. What the fuck is wrong with us? Let’s just be us again. Like you said.”
I stripped off my boxer briefs proudly and without shame, getting in under the hot spray of the water.
“Holy hell, that is what I needed,” I declared, letting the water heat me through. “This is making me a whole new man.”
Sawyer stripped naked and joined me a moment later. I acted like I always had before, not letting my eyes linger on any one part of his body.
We could be us. We could do this.
“I’m so glad you said something,” Sawyer told me as he took a turn under the hot water. “It was eating away at me this week, wondering what was up between us.”
“You could have said something. You can always tell me anything, and you know that.”
“Well, you could have said something, too.”
I sighed. “I hate it when you’re right.”
We showered off, every moment of the heat restoring me to some semblance of feeling human again. After a comfortable silence, Sawyer cocked his head to one side, giving me a look.
