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She blows out a frustrated breath. “Because I love you, and I want you to be happy. I saw you with Lincoln. And you know what? He is it for you. I got to know him when we were pretending, Jo, and you’re it for him, too. That’s it. That’s the whole story. So pull your head out of your ass and get over this one blip so you can celebrate that baby. Then you and Jonah and the baby can build your future together with Lincoln.”
I should be mad at the way she’s talking to me, but in that moment, I realize something important.
It takes a good friend to point out when you’re turning a blind eye to something. It takes a best friend to call you out on your shit.
“What baby?” a small voice asks from behind me.
All the blood drains from my face before I whip around to find Jonah standing there.
Oh shit.
Sam just called me out about keeping secrets, and I’m about to hold onto another one.
I clear my throat. “Oh, it’s nothing, honey. Just mom talk.” I offer him a smile, but I’m certain it comes off as weak and insincere.
He narrows his little eyes at me. “Are you having a baby?” he point blank asks.
How can I lie to him? He’s my little boy. I blow out a breath, and then I nod. “Yes. But I haven’t told anybody yet.”
His eyes grow as wide as saucers. “I’m getting a little brother or sister?” he asks.
I nod as I smile. This isn’t how I wanted him to find out, but it is what it is. “You sure are.”
He punches a fist into the air. “Yes! Let’s go! I’m going to be the best big brother ever! But I really hope it’s a boy. I already have two little sisters at Dad’s house.” He wrinkles his nose, and I can’t help a laugh.
I kneel down and pull him into a tight squeeze. “You already are the best big brother ever, Jonah. I love you.”
“Love you too, Mom.”
I glance up at Sam, and she’s smiling down at the two of us. I guess she approves of my honesty with my son.
Now if I could just listen to Sam’s advice and pull my head out of my ass, I might be able to work up the nerve to let the dad in on my little surprise.
But I’m still not so sure we’ll be able to figure out a way to move forward together even when I finally do tell him.
CHAPTER 12: LINCOLN
Players have the next day off, and it also happens to be the same day as the product launch. I bring a suit with me to the office so I can change and go from here this evening.
I spend my morning meeting with Mike and Andy as we talk about the game plan ahead of this Sunday, and I admit to Mike that I’m considering benching Brandon Fletcher for our QB3.
“Give the kid another chance,” he begs. “I see something there. He just hasn’t let it out yet.”
I’m wary to do it, but I agree. Maybe I agree because of the words Mike said to me the other day, or maybe I agree because I’m still coming to terms with a lot of my own shit. Either way. I agree. “Fine. For one quarter. But if he doesn’t let it out and prove himself in that one quarter, he’s out.”
It’s shortly before I need to get changed for the event when I call my private investigator to check in on what he’s found on Jeremy.
“Nothing yet,” he tells me. “No record, hasn’t missed a single child support payment. The only thing I can really find is that he’s married to his job. He’s at FDB late every night, only leaving early when he’s got a company happy hour.”
“There has to be something. Money laundering? Insider trading? Bar fight? Anything?”
“Sorry, man,” he says. “He’s squeaky clean. There’s a possibility he’s staying late for nefarious reasons, which I’m investigating now. He sometimes walks out with the same female at the same time. Could be a work project, could be something else, and given that he cheated on his ex, it wouldn’t surprise me. But apart from occasionally taking an Uber home after drinking too much at happy hour, I’m coming up empty. I’ll text along some photos we’ve gotten, though.”
That just seems…impossible. I’ve seen how this guy treats his son, and I’ve seen how he treats his ex. He’s a dick.
But maybe he’s just a dick who’s married to his job. He prioritizes work instead of giving his family the attention they deserve.
Would I be like that if I had kids?
