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“I’m so fucking sorry. We’ll fix this. Okay? We’ll fix this,” I say, and I hear the desperation in my own voice.
“How?” she asks.
Good fucking question.
CHAPTER 21: JOLENE
When Sam walks through the door a little after midnight, I’m still awake. I’m lying on the couch as I stare up at the ceiling wondering what the hell I’m supposed to do now, and I didn’t even realize what time it was.
“Hey,” I say, and I sit up.
She smiles at me.
She smiles. I haven’t seen her smile in days.
“What are you so happy about? Good night in the ER?”
“I, uh, actually wasn’t at work. Devin called.” She blushes a little.
“Devin called?” I repeat.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you and let you think I was at work while you managed the boys. I promise I won’t do it again, but he called this morning, and you already said you’d handle things here, so I switched days at work and, well, yeah, Devin called.” She’s grinning by the time she’s done babbling.
“And…what did he say?”
Her grin widens a little. “That he ended things with Maddy.”
“He ended things with Maddy?” I repeat, and obviously I’m a fucking parrot tonight because I can’t seem to come up with any of my own words.
“He said he never stopped loving me. When he saw I was with the coach, he felt like it was time to move on. But when he found out the truth, he realized he couldn’t move on with the wrong woman.” More blindingly bright teeth from the big smile. “We’re taking things slow, but we’re trying.”
I stand and walk over to give her a hug. “I’m so happy for you,” I whisper.
“We decided not to tell Cade until we’re more sure of things, but I can already picture Christmas with the three of us and weeknights where we’re doing homework and maybe down the road, a brother or sister.” She sighs a little dreamily. “Look at us, bestie. It’s all working out for both of us.”
Oh, right. It’s all working out for both of us.
I burst into tears, and at this rate I’m going to be dehydrated with all the crying I’ve been doing lately. I’ve been an emotional basket case thanks to all this shit with my job on top of the shit with Lincoln.
“Oh shit,” she says, and she ushers me over to the couch. “What’s wrong?”
I blow out a breath and hand her my phone where the article is already pulled up.
She scans it, and she twists her lips as she goes. She scrunches up her nose when she gets to the final paragraph. “Ew. That’s horrible.”
“I know. I have no idea who leaked it, but I can’t prove it’s false because I did go out with Austin, and he kissed me at the end of the meal, and I wouldn’t be surprised if this was Rivera’s doing. People keep trying to tear Lincoln and me apart, and I’m not sure how we’re going to stay together when there’s so much stacked against us.” I’m rambling, but if I can’t ramble to my best friend, who can I ramble to?
“Oh babe,” she says, and I know she doesn’t know what to say to me because there really is nothing she can say that’ll make any of this better.
“I’m trying to figure out what to do. I don’t know if I should let them win and end it with Linc or quit my job. Rivera hates me, and he will stop at nothing to take me down,” I say.
“What if Rivera isn’t working alone?” she asks.
“It’s not like that thought hasn’t occurred to me. I wouldn’t put it past Jeremy, either. He doesn’t like that I’m fighting for sole parental rights, so he could be trying to taint my image in the media.” It’s been a mere thought until I voice it to Sam, and suddenly I’m convinced it’s true. “The worst part is that people already thought all this about me, anyway, and this just confirms it. I’m trying really hard not to let it get me down.”
Sam reaches over to squeeze my shoulder. “You’re the strongest lady I know,” she says quietly. “Of course this won’t get you down. And you and Lincoln, you’ll figure out your shit. You’ll make this work. I’m sure of it.”
“I just…I feel alone, Sam. My parents won’t talk to me because I’m with him. Hell, my dad hates Lincoln so much that Jonah barely mentioned the man’s name at the dinner table one day and my dad lost his shit on the poor kid. My job is slipping away from me. Linc is slipping away from me. You haven’t been talking to me…” I shake my head. “I just feel like I’m losing everything.”
