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“E ipo,” she says, which means ‘darling,’ “ngakau reka,” ‘sweetheart,’ “it’s okay.”
“I’m sorry,” I say while I bawl my eyes out. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s all right.” She kisses my neck and hugs me tightly. “It’s a huge shock.”
“It’s not that I don’t want it…”
“I know!”
“I just can’t believe it.”
“I know, me either. When Catie first pointed it out, I was adamant she was wrong. I didn’t want to hope. But it’s nearly a hundred percent accurate.” She moves to my side, pulls my hands away from my face, then holds my chin to force me to look at her. “We’re having a baby,” she says, smiling, as she looks into my eyes.
I continue to cry, unable to hold back the tears.
She moves to sit on my lap and puts her arms around me. “Hey, come on, why are you so upset?”
I brush my hand over my face. “I was thinking about Shaz.”
“Ahhh…”
“I was unfair to her.”
“Why, sweetheart?”
“Because I lied to her. I said I didn’t have feelings for you, but I did. Right from the start.”
She rests her head against mine.
“Do you think Saxon was right?” I ask. “That there’s more to it than science? I wonder if a part of me didn’t want children with Shaz, and so my body refused to comply. I let her down, because it wasn’t her fault, and forced her to endure all those months of unhappiness when she discovered it hadn’t worked.”
“Aw, Henry. Come on, you didn’t do it on purpose.”
“No, but I think maybe I did it subconsciously.”
“Love, I think you have great discipline, but I don’t think even you could convince your own sperm not to swim upstream.”
That makes me laugh, and she grins.
“It’s really true?” I ask.
“It seems so! We made a baby. Oh my God, I don’t believe it.” She kisses my cheeks, brushing away the tears. “You clever, clever man.”
I give a short laugh and wipe my face. “I worked really hard at it.”
She giggles and throws her arms around me, and we have a big hug.
“You know what this means,” she whispers. “I can say goodbye to Cam properly.”
I bury my face in her neck, thinking of her ex, and feeling some pity for him. “Do you think he’ll be upset?”
“Honestly? Maybe a little. And maybe not. I think he’ll probably feel relieved once the shock wears off. It would have meant a whole lot of hassle for him and not much fun. He needs to meet someone else more suitable for him. He understands his issues more now, and he can look for a partner who’ll be able to help him.”
She moves back and kisses me. “And we can start together properly. With our baby.”
The warm summer breeze whips at our hair and blows sand across us, but we don’t care. I kiss her, and then we just hold each other, letting the realization sink in that, corny as it is, this is the first day of the rest of our lives.
*
