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I departed, handing my favourite mare off to a groom.
The podium scene was a natural place to cause a stir. Typically, if a woman connected to a player presented the trophy, it was a sure sign they were serious. Moreover, it was customary tokisssaid girl. I assumed that would be alright given Alexandra’s endorsement. If I did not do so, the press would suspect we were on the rocks or not together. It was a must. So, I would give her a nice, chaste kiss to prove we were fine—nothing more. I didn’t want to frighten the poor thing.
We returned for the awarding of the prize. And, no doubt, they pulled the Queen up to do the honours. She looked nervous but happy—basking in her moment in the sun. That was good for her. And we’d get bragging rights early in the season. I wondered if she’d be permitted to travel to Windsor for our next match. I suspected if we announced our engagement before that, it would work out for us. It would be odd if I travelled without her, wouldn’t it?
Alexandra stepped forward to present the trophy in front of the waiting press. People clapped. And that is when I kissed her, our hands both on the trophy. I expected it to be a simple, quick gesture, but, to my surprise, she really went for it. She held onto me for a moment, wrapping her arms around my neck. It wasn’t half bad. She knew what she was doing, so I didn’t have to fake anything or whip it up. When I pulled away, it was clear she’d surprised even herself in the moment.
She quickly returned to ceremonial mode. As we filed out, my entire team gave me shit in our mother tongue about it. I wasn’t even sure what to say.
“Good?” I asked.
“Good.” She grinned. “I think.”
We didn’t get to say much more until we were headed home. She waited around for me to finish, playing the role of girlfriend dutifully. It was so strange. She was the Queen playing twenty-something polo girlfriend and she was good at it. It was believable—as believable as the kiss. She was coming into her own. We were selling it. Bythe time we were headed back to the palace, the press ate out of our hands.
“You’re good at this. That was a convincing way to handle it, Alexandra,” I said.
“Really?”
“Yes. Way to sell it. I didn’t plan for it to go that well. I was going to be sweet about it and do it to make sure no one suspected anything. Nice call, Your Majesty. We fooled ‘em.”
She fell quiet.
“You alright? I didn’t overstep I hope.”
“No.” Alexandra’s body language closed.
By the time we made it back to the palace, she was silent and prickly.
Where had I gone wrong? I thought I’d behaved. I didn’t chat up other girls or flirt with the member of the British delegation I’d slept with about a month before in a one-off in Brussels. I didn’t so much as acknowledge her out of respect for Alexandra. What more could have I done?
I walked her back to her quarters, obligated somehow. Then, I wanted to know what I did to hurt her. I didn’t like leaving her in this way.
“Alexandra,” I said, “what could I do differently? You’re upset with me.”
“I’m not!”
“You are. Don’t lie to me.”
“I am cross because you act like you couldn’t havepossiblyjust kissed me.”
“It’s a ruse, Alexandra. We are on the same page?—”
“Are we? Because I’m down with the ruse, but you acting like kissing me is such a laborious, awful thing is cruel! I thought you enjoyed it enough. I didn’t realise you were so repulsed by me that?—”
Oof. She had feelings for me. That was bad news.
“Alexandra, I didn’t realise… I didn’t mean…”
Her face indicated she was about to burst into tears. I was a dickhead. What could I even say?
“I didn’t find it off-putting. Are we done playing a game?”
“Of course not,” Alexandra said. “But you act like you don’t even like me. Rick, we have fun. At least pretend you can bother to stomach this. I cannot continue to act like your girlfriend if you pretend like it’s so ridiculous you could ever find me attractive.”
I stepped forward, putting my arms on her shoulders. Despite being tiny, she was intimidating when she wanted to be. Her anger and disappointment worked effectively. I acted tough, but I didn’t like hurting her. Something about her innocence and sweet demeanour gave me such nerves. So, maybe she was saying she didn’t have romantic feelings for me, but she wanted to be respected? I could do that much. I hoped, anyway.
“It’s not that I find you repulsive or any of this ridiculous, okay? I find you to be a fun friend. I like hanging out with you. It’s not that. I just wanted to be clear?—”
