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“No, it was… understandable. I’ve thought a lot about what you said and you were right. I did take advantage of your grief, but I also want you to know that it came from a place of loss and hurt on my own part. After Mike left me for someone else, I was really struggling with my self-esteem. I missed having Mira around to talk to; she was always there to talk sense into me when he and I were going through something. She really was an amazing person and if she knew how I behaved, how I made you feel, she would be really hurt by my actions. So I’m sorry. I’m also incredibly sorry for talking to Daphne. I had no reason to do that. I went to apologize to her at school the other day, but I must have just missed her because she wasn’t there.”
I let out a sigh. I’m thoroughly shocked to hear her talk like this. “I appreciate that. I know we both acted on our feelings of loss and loneliness. I should have handled things better with you… and with Mira.”
“I— I knew,” she says nervously.
“You knew?” I ask, confused.
“About Ken.” She says the name as if I should know who she’s talking about.
“Ken who?” Then it hits me. “Ken? That’s his name? The man she loved?”
“Shit.” She hangs her head. “Sorry. I thought you knew.”
“I knew there was someone else. I knew she was in love with him but that’s about it. I asked her once but she didn’t tell me so I left it at that. I didn’t want to know.” I spin in my chair, staring out the window of my office. “Whatever happened to him?”
“I don’t know for sure. She told me that she called it off with him after getting sick. She didn’t tell him why, just that she couldn’t do it any longer. I guess he took it really hard, started spiraling and begging her to come back.”
“Did you ever meet him?”
“No. Never saw a picture of him or anything. I just knew his name. Ken.”
“Ken what?” I spin back around in my chair to look at her. I’m not sure what I’m going to do if I have his last name. What would be the point in finding out who he is now?
“I don’t know. She never told me his last name. I just saw him saved in her phone as KF. Anyway”—she stands up—“I should get going but I’m sorry this conversation went in this direction. It wasn’t my intention. I—I’m just sorry for everything.” She walks out my office, leaving my head spinning with that name.
* * *
“I don’t want to go to school, Daddy!” Daisy’s face grows red as tears stream down her cheeks.
“What has gotten into you?” I try to hide my frustration, but Daisy’s tantrums have grown increasingly out of control this last week. “You love school, sweetie.”
“Not anymore!” she shouts, throwing her socks across her bedroom. “I want Miss Flowers back,” she says through tearful hiccups.
Fuck. I had hoped she wouldn’t have caught on that there was something between us that is now not between us.
“Sweetie.” I take a seat on the bed next to her, trying to figure out what to say to her. I don’t even know what to say to comfort myself about losing her. I haven’t even accepted the fact that I have lost her. “Sometimes men and women, even if they love each other very much, can’t make things work.” She looks up at me like she has no idea what I’m saying. “Shit, okay,” I mutter to myself as I try to think how to reword it.
“I don’t like my new teacher.”
“What? What do you mean new teacher? What happened to Miss Flowers?”
“She’s gone,” she says, her lip starting to quiver again.
“Sweetie. Daisy, look at me.” I stand up. “Miss Flowers isn’t your teacher anymore or is she just gone for a few days and is coming back?”
“I dunno. Mr. Fein said Miss Flowers is gone and we have a new teacher, Miss Pickler.”
“A new teacher?”
“That’s what I’m saying!” she says, completely exasperated. Now I get why she’s crying and throwing a tantrum.
“How long has she been gone?”
She shrugs. “A long time.”
“Okay, Daisy, listen to me.” I realize I’m not going to get the answers I need from her. “I need you to put your socks and shoes on so I can take you to school. I promise you, I’m going to find out where Miss Flowers is, okay? I’m going to get this figured out.”
“You promise?”
