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‘But how could you be?’ Baffled, she shook her head. ‘You were with me right up to when I got in the car with your brother.’
‘Yes, I was, but then I called them as soon as you left and told them how you’d just gotten in the car with Angus, and that I – we, me and Shea and Jack – were concerned for your safety.’
‘You did that.’ It felt like someone had just kicked her in the stomach. ‘And Jack and Shea know about this, too?’
He halted, as if not wanting to answer, and she held her hands up. ‘Don’t, just stop talking.’ His browbeaten look told her everything she needed to know. ‘I can’t take much more.’
Liars, all of them!
Anger bubbled and rose from the murky depths of her heart, old anger, new anger, all of which felt shocking and red raw as she came back to earth with an almighty thump. She felt the sudden sting of tears, but quickly blinked them back.
‘We were only doing what we thought was best, Sammie, and I was the one that eventually made the call. Shea was on the fence with it all, to be honest.’ He was rushing his words now, his desperation evident. ‘Your dad said he was going to go and find you, and take you home.’ His voice broke, and tears ran down his cheeks. ‘Please, try and understand I only did it because I loved you, and was worried for you, getting into a car with Angus in the state he was.’ He reached out to her. ‘Sammie, please.’
Bitterly hurt, and deeply disappointed, she jumped to her feet, well out of his reach. ‘You’ve gone and done the one thing I told you is make or break for me; you’ve lied to me, and not only this trip home, but for years, Connor.’ Her hands came to cover her quivering mouth. ‘And to think that Shea and Jack knew this the entire time, and kept it from me too.’
‘Sammie, no, please don’t think of it like that.’ He stood, took a step towards her, but when she took a step back, he stopped short. ‘I was the one that made the call. Shea was trying to talk me out of it as I dialled your dad’s number. And we, I, didn’t tell you, because none of us thought it would offer any relief, and it certainly wasn’t going to change anything.’
‘You all kept it from me.’ Stabbing her chest with her finger, she roared every word as the solid ground she’d been standing on with him gave way, and she once again felt adrift in a choppy sea. ‘And no matter how you spin it, or turn it inside out, an omission is choosing to lie.’ The waves of hurt intensified, crashing over her. ‘I’m going to go, and don’t you dare try to follow me.’
‘But…’ He reached for her.
‘No, I don’t want to hear any more.’ Brushing past him, she headed down the pathway, towards the farmhouse, where she could get in her car and get the heck out of there.
‘Sammie, please, wait.’
She ached to turn back to him, and run into his arms for the comfort she so needed, but how could he be the one to console her, when he was the one who’d just caused her heart to break in two? Sobs filled with anger and regret and heartbreak broke from her as she stormed away from him. The time between getting to the hire car and driving home was a haze. Arriving at the homestead, she ran for the safety of the house, needing, wanting, desperate to be locked away from this horrible world, this horrible place. Wrapping her arms around herself, she slid against the wall until she was sitting on the floor, her knees cuddled to her. Thank god Shea and Jack weren’t here right now because she wouldn’t be able to be in the same room as them. She was going to try and change her return ticket so she could leave as soon as possible, because she didn’t want to see either of them before she left. This was going to take some time, and London would give her the time and space she needed to try and move past it. If she ever could. For now, she couldn’t wait to leave Gum Tree Gully, and put as much distance between herself and Connor, Shea and Jack as she possibly could.
CHAPTER
21
Her eyes flying open, but unable to move, Samantha was left with the lingering sense of having been Connor Gunn’s wife. She could smell the casserole in the oven, could hear their little girl singing as she painted at the breakfast bar, could feel his arms slipping around her waist as he came up behind her and placed his lips against her cheek. Then, in a heartbeat, she was making her way down a hallway, towards a bathroom. Thunder rumbled overhead, and the floorboards gave way beneath her bare feet. Freefalling, with arms flailing, she landed on hot, sun-baked earth. More thunder boomed, deafening this time, and a bright crack of lightning quickly followed, striking the ground way too close for her comfort. She started running as fast as she could, to get to safety before the storm hit, but there wasn’t a building in sight. The surrounding trees shook branches at her, their gnarled limbs scratching and tearing at her skin. She tried to cry out, but the wild wind was whipping every word, every breath, from her lips. Then her left foot hit air, and so did her right. She frantically grappled for the edge of the ravine, her fingernails lifting as she clawed for her life. Heat scorched the soles of her feet. She dared a glance beneath her, her fear escalating to absolute terror as flames of a roaring bushfire grasped for her. The black billowing smoke suddenly engulfed her, and she tried to hold her breath but she was suffocating. And then her fingernails lifted, and she was falling, burning, screaming, dying.
Samantha woke drenched with sweat and kicking the sheets from her. Realising she’d been having a nightmare, she sat up and fought to drag in breath. The ceiling fan’s blades were still and the hum of the air conditioner had ceased. The electricity was clearly on the blink. Fanning her face, she climbed from the tousled bed, taking a second to balance herself as the thump of a hangover arrived behind her temples. She needed to get outside, where she could breathe. Stumbling, she bent to pick up the two empty bottles of wine she’d dropped from the bed at some ungodly hour. Catching her reflection in the mirror, she grimaced. She looked like death warmed up, and then some. Burning the candle at both ends was proving she wasn’t made of steel.
And all for what?
She’d worked her guts out to be as successful as she was, and done everything she could to build a life that had all gone to shit. And now, just as she’d thought she might have finally found her way, her life had blown up again. She should’ve known that her world was going to be upended by coming back here – putting it the right way up was going to be a near impossible task. But she was going to have to dig her heels in and brace herself for returning to London, because that was where her life was.
Whether she liked it or not.
But for now, she was stuck here. After calling the airlines she’d learnt she couldn’t change her ticket. There were no seats left. She’d have to ride the storm out, until she could leave this godforsaken place. Maybe, tomorrow, she’d go to Cairns and stay in a hotel until her flight, so she didn’t have to see anyone again. Not Connor. Not Shea. Not Jack. Yes, that’s what she was going to do. But first, she needed to sober up, and make sure she was ready to drive the four hours back to the coast. After a quick glance out the window at the softly lit blue sky, she’d decided a ride might be just the thing to blow the remnants of Connor from her soul.
Undressing from her pyjamas, she grabbed clothes from the pile she was yet to fold, and tugged on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt. The house was unnervingly silent as she made her way down the steps and out the back door. After a sleepless night, filled with regrets and rage and heartache, her tears had done nothing to help ease the anguish of her loved ones’ lies.
Twenty minutes later, Garth’s hooves pounded the earth beneath her. It had seemed like a good idea at the time, riding him bareback through the scrublands, but with the weather changing its mood as ominous clouds ravenously swallowed up the blue sky she’d awoken to, and longed to be beneath in a bid to try and rid the deep ache from her heart, she began to question her hasty decision. Both she and Garth startled as a strike of lightning was followed by a crack of thunder. Then the heavens split, and rain poured down in sheets, the wild wind whipping each drop painfully against her exposed skin. Then something shot out of the bushland, and came straight for them, barely missing Garth’s front hooves. She only caught a glimpse of the wild boar as it bolted. Seconds passed like minutes. Whinnying, Garth reared up in fright.
‘Nooooo.’ Her cry jarred as the horse thudded back to the ground, only to rear again.
Grabbing handfuls of mane, she fought to stay on Garth’s back. But she couldn’t hang on tight enough. Fear fired into the pit of her stomach. She was slipping. She had to jump, or risk being trodden under the horse’s feet. A split second later and she was flailing through the air like a rag doll, with the ground rapidly approaching. Tensing for the fall, she felt the impact knock every bit of air from her lungs. Immediate fire tore along her back and burst into her legs. Hooves thudded dangerously close beside her. Gasping for her next breath, she tried to lift her head, but couldn’t. Agony had her pinned to the ground, and unable to drag enough air into her dazed lungs. Excruciating pain shredded the edges of the dark mist engulfing her. Then the ground gave way beneath her, and she was falling, slipping, spinning sickeningly into a deep dark world.
***
Sitting at his desk, with his mind on one thing, and one thing only – the very woman who owned his heart, yet he’d gone and unintentionally broken hers – Connor ran his fingers through his ruffled hair and frowned at the computer screen. If only he could focus, but thoughts of Samantha and what happened the day before kept stealing his attention. With his head pounding, the figures were all starting to blur into one. Taking a moment, he rubbed his temples as he looked out the office window. Brooding dark clouds had rolled in thick and fast from the coast and had made true on their promise. After a week of blazing hot skies and ever-increasing humidity, Gum Tree Gully could do with the heavy shower of regenerating rain.
Behind him, the door creaked and a gust of hot air filled the air-conditioned room. Looking over his shoulder, he smiled. ‘Hey, Mum, I didn’t hear you pull up.’
‘So I see.’ Her smile was a little tight. ‘If I was a thief, I would’ve gotten all the loot, and hightailed it out of here without you even knowing.’
