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I check out the cabin, already aware of the amenities, perks, and upgrades. I viewed it all online, and Caleb did a video call with me as he scoped it out in person before I accepted the seller’s offer. It’s a far cry from the “home” I left in New York. It’s smaller and rustic, but it will work. I see what my friend meant when he said it’s cozy but not. I can see myself comfortable here with the peace and quiet the area provides, but I spot the modern touch, too. It’s a smart home, which I prefer, and the updated details suit my taste in a nice blend of contemporary and rustic.
I’m sure that I can be comfortable and happy here—with or without Aubrey in my life. I’m staying in the area because not only do I want to be near Caleb for our friendship, but I’m also eager to help him with business too. I’m retired. I want to focus on my foundations, but I know how it’ll go. That drive to be productive is hard to silence, and I’m sure by next year, Caleb and I will be true partners in real estate out here.
A grin covers my face, and when I spot it in the reflection of the fridge as I leave my new kitchen, I hope I’ll stay this spirited. I’m not going to get my hopes up. I can’t. My heart can’t take it, so with a measured dose of optimism, I leave to go see if Aubrey can help me complete my life now that I’m starting afresh.
It’s a tricky lesson, one I struggled to accept and learn. Now that I’m wiser about it all, I’ll tread more carefully. My biggest mistake with Johanna was letting her become my whole life. I dreamed of settling down and allowed the ideal of her consume me without stopping long enough to see that she didn’t want me, she wanted what I offered in terms of dollar signs and popularity. It took coming out here and seeing how Aubrey cared about none of that to understand the difference.
I want Aubrey to fulfil me, but I can’t lose sight of the fact I’m not a broken or lacking person, or less-than, if I am single. I have worth, and Aubrey always saw that.
I get in my truck and drive to the Goldfinch, hoping I’ll find her there and be the bigger person. I kept thinking and wishing she would have asked me to stay. In New York, I latched onto the idea that she must not feel as strongly for me as I did for her when she didn’t ask. Caleb helped me rationalize through that thought, though. He had me put it into perspective. We combed through what it could have been like for her to lose her parents, then everything else. She never had a chance to ask anyone to stay before. She hadn’t had a chance to ask her parents not to die. It just happened, similar to what I did when I flew away.
This time, I know it’s on me. If she’s the one I want—and she is—I’ve got to overcome my insecurities and tell her. I’ve got to make her understand what I want, and that contrary to what I did by flying to New York, I won’t be going anywhere. My new house is one part of proof in that intention.
I don’t find her at the bed-and-breakfast, though. It’s the weekend, so I figured she’d be here, not in town at her new apartment. It’s not a school day, so I counted on her spending her free time here with Lauren or Marian.
“Dalton!”
I turn at Lauren’s squeal of surprise. I pivot just in time to catch her hug.
“Welcome back!” She holds me at arm’s length. “Isn’t that cabin perfect?”
I smile, fighting back the nerves that hit me. She’s excited to see me, but I can’t shake the anxiety that Aubrey might not be, at least not like this.
“It is.” A slight pause carries on too much, and I wish I was better at speaking up. “Is…”
“Caleb’s out with Marian, arguing over a new truck.”
I raise my brows. “The old pickup died?”
She nods. “May it rest in peace. Meadow Lane got the best of it.”
I chuckle. “I was actually wondering if, uh…”
“Aubrey’s in town.” She frowns. “Didn’t Caleb tell you she got the teaching job?”
“Yeah, he did. I remember.”
“She’s got an apartment in town,” she adds.
I know this too, but hearing her say that so soon after asking me about my new home, I can’t help but worry. We’ve got our own places, so why should I cling to a hope that Aubrey will give up hers and join me at mine?
Again, the silence between us is telling.
“Dalton?”
“Hmm?” I look up at her, and I see how she’s sympathetic toward my uneasiness.
“She told me she was going to a coffee shop for lunch. She’s already so busy with grading papers, and she needs a chance to eat without working at the same time. She might still be there.”
“The one with the cranky old guys who play chess?”
She smiles. “Yep. That’s the one.” Then she purses her lips, scolding me. “And they’re not cranky. At least Earl isn’t. He’s sweet once you get to know him.”
I laugh once. “I’ll take your word on that.” I’ll never forget when Caleb and I ran into Earl and Ken on our fishing trip. They couldn’t stop laughing at how I mishandled my fishing pole.
At least they didn’t call me a fancy rich guy like the construction idiots. I suppose that’s polite of them.
I leave Lauren at the Goldfinch and drive like hell down Meadow Lane. It’s no mystery why Marian’s ancient pickup puttered out. The path is rockier and bumpier than I remember it being, but that doesn’t entice me to slow down. I speed all the way down the mountain, through the small town, then enter Breckenridge. I spot the coffee shop with ease, and I rush to park in the first spot that’s open. It’s not close, so I jog until I reach the doors to the coffee place.
