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Because it was going to be a long four days on the road if I could only see her from a distance.
I snuggled back into the solid body behind me and relished the way the heat of him enveloped me. Cuddled on the sofa with Mason was my new favorite place to be. We’d been back in Boston for five days, and we had another two to spend together before he left again. We’d spent all but a night or two at his place, because relaxing on his sofa in his arms with a blanket draped over us, watching our favorite show, was nothing short of perfect.
“It’s fucking annoying how long it took Booth to admit how he felt.” I couldn’t see Mason’s face, but I could tell by the tone of his voice that he was glaring at the TV. “Man up already.”
“Really?” I chuckled, rolling to my back so I could tease him. “So if you liked somebody, you’d tell them right away? Cause I remember?—”
He mussed my hair and dropped a kiss to the tip of my nose. “Hey, don’t give me shit. I was seventeen. And you were way out of my league.”
I rolled my eyes but leaned into him. “Oh, please.”
In one fluid movement, he pushed up and hovered over me.
“You were and still are so far out of my league,” he said, his green eyes full of intense honesty and a hint of fear. “And it stresses me out to know that at any moment, you might realize it.”
Heat crept up my neck and into my face at his honest—though off-base—admission.
Shifting so he was balanced on his good arm, he cupped my cheek. “I was an idiot back then. This time, I made my intentions clear pretty quickly, didn’t I? It was what, three days before I locked you up?”
A nervous laugh escaped me, because although he wasn’t wrong… “I guess.” With everything between us, it was hard to call us together. Even if part of me wanted to be.
Any trace of lightness in his expression vanished at my words, and suddenly, he was glowering at me. “We have issues to deal with, Aurora. But don’t think that means I’m not 100 percent invested in this. In us.”
My heart skipped at the sincerity that laced every word. I felt the same way, and I wanted, more than anything, to believe we had a future. But it was hard to picture it with the way things were right now. “I know it’s just…”
I was at a loss for how to put my fears into words. Because I’d been running myself ragged, mentally working through every scenario, and the only solution I had come up with was one I wasn’t sure I’d be okay with. In order to be with Mason and stay in Boston, I’d have to quit my job. I could work at a rehab facility locally. Or maybe even a hospital. If it meant I could have Mason too, it was worth considering. But this solution meant giving up one dream for another. Because Mason had firmly cemented himself in that category. A real relationship with him was now a dream. It had only been a couple of weeks, but we’d picked up right where we left off eleven years ago. Like no time had passed. And it was easy to admit, to myself at least, that I wanted this feeling, this man, forever.
“Just be here with me.” He kissed me quickly, then pushed to his feet and headed for the kitchen.
As he went, my stomach twisted itself into knots. Had I upset him? The thought had just taken hold when he appeared again, carrying a bottle of my favorite flavor of sparkling water. Relief washed over me, and I couldn’t stop the smile that spread across my face. He always knew when I needed something, and he paid attention to the little things. Keeping my favorite brand and flavored water in his fridge might not seem like much, but it was just one of many, many things he did to show he cared, and the thought he put into making me feel appreciated still floored me.
I sat up, and he dropped onto the cushion beside me and pulled me close. As I rested my head on his good shoulder, he threaded his fingers through my hair, instantly banishing all my worries.
A contented sigh escaped me. It was nice to be here together. Although we saw each other at the stadium all week, we had to act indifferent toward each other, and I hated it. We both did. But when he pressed his lips against my temple, my body sagged, and a future with him didn’t feel hopeless. It felt perfect.
“Are you crazy?” My chest tightened at the thought. I could not have heard him correctly. “We can’t go out to dinner.”
For the last few weeks, we’d spent every night he was in Boston together, but we’d stayed at either his place or mine.
“I’ll wear a hat.” He shrugged. “No one will recognize us, and as of today, it’s been two months since you let me kiss you again. I want to take you somewhere nice. Spoil you.”
My heart stuttered, and all my arguments escaped me. I’d had no idea it was a special day, but of course, he did. And I’d never had anyone make a big deal of something as silly as a two-month anniversary of the day he kissed me. Hell, the guy I dated for almost two years forgot our one-year anniversary.
Mason looped his arms around my waist and tucked me into his chest. “What’s the point of being a rich baseball player if I can’t even spoil my girl with dinner on our anniversary?”
This man. I swallowed back the emotion threatening to overtake me. Because no matter how much I longed to experience life with him outside the walls of our apartments, I couldn’t. Not yet. “They see you in a hat all the time,” I finally mumbled, because it was the easiest response.
“It sounds strange, but when I’m out in Boston wearing a hat, they don’t see Mason Dumpty.” He chuckled against my ear. The sound and the way it vibrated through us both sent a shiver down my spine. “So what do you say? Can I take my girl to dinner?”
“Mason.” My whole being ached with the urge to say yes. This man made it so hard to say no. “We can’t. I’ll get fired if they find out. It’s my job on the line, not yours.”
He slumped in my arms, and with a sigh into my hair, he pressed his lips against my forehead. “Sorry. You’re right. I’m not being fair. I’ll DoorDash something for dinner.”
The way his shoulders sagged with disappointment when he pulled back a little made my heart splinter. More than anything, I wanted to go out to dinner with him. I wanted to do all the things normal couples did. But it wasn’t realistic. At least right now.
“It’s not that I don’t want to…” I ran my fingers down his arm, hoping he sensed my sincerity.
“I know, babe. It’s fine.” He shrugged.
