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I nod my head, knowing that the second I leave this room I am googling everything.
“You’re doing a great job, though, Mom. Don’t worry” The teacher says, patting me on the arm.
Before I can correct her, she continues on.
“Here is Violet’s most recent work.” She takes a few pieces of paper out of the red folder she has sitting on the desk. “She’s done really well so far. Her reading level is several grades above where we’d expect right now.”
“She loves to read at home.”
Mrs. Wilfred smiles. “I can tell that you are wonderful parents. You should be so proud.”
“T-thank you.” I don’t have it in me to correct her now. I feel my face heat at the lie of omission. I hope Sean never finds out. I would be mortified.
Mrs. Wilfred continues on, taking me through her progress and performance. I’m thrilled, but the embarrassment lingers, and I’m relieved when our time is up. She hands me the folder to keep.
“It was lovely to meet you, Mrs. Daniels.”
“S-same. Thank you.” I clutch the folder of Violet’s things to my chest and run out the door.
Mrs. Daniels. It plays on repeat in my head, all the way home. I groan, hating how much I like the sound of that. What is wrong with me?
“Thanks for watching her,” I say as I walk into the house. I run a hand through my hair.
“No problem,” Heather says, her smile quickly faltering as she looks over me. She knows something is off.
But I don’t want to talk about it. I try not to give anything away as I hang up my jacket and take off my shoes. I will myself to be normal. Because the last thing I need tonight is to admit to my best friend that I’ve lost my mind, and the reason is because I’m secretly starting a relationship with the very man who hired me and now, I’m daydreaming about how it would sound for me to have his name.
It sounds insane.
“How were the kids?” I ask. A perfectly normal question for this perfectly normal situation. I take a deep breath, schooling my face for the moment I have to turn around and face Heather once more.
It is much harder to lie when she can see me. Much harder.
“They were good. Violet was pretty tired, actually. She’s already asleep.”
“Oh wow, thank you.”
Heather shrugs. “You’re sure you’re alright? You seem…off.”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I say, taking a seat at the island. “Just a little tired. You know, that time in the school year.” It’s not a lie, so I can keep eye contact without squirming.
“Yeah, that makes sense.” She walks over and gives me a hug. “I have a substitute job in the morning, Richard is still out sick.”
“Oh, that’s too bad. I mean, it’s good for you though. It’s good for you to escape the McMansion every once in a while and remember how the rest of us live.” I stick my tongue out at her.
“Yeah,” she yawns. “So I should probably head out. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Of course.”
After trying and failing to wake a very sleepy Jake from the couch, Heather scoops him into her arms and I walk them to the door. I’m nearly clear of the critical questions.
She turns back around. “You’re sure you’re okay, Astrid?”
Dammit. “I’m sure.” I give my best friend the most genuine smile I can manage to keep her from seeing through me. It’s a hollow feeling. I’ll need to tell her eventually. Just not tonight.
I watch her drive away before I make my way back to the couch. Completely and totally exhausted.
I snuggle onto the couch, draping one of the blankets across my lap. I should probably go to bed, but for some reason I can’t bring myself to walk down those stairs. It just feels so far away.
