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“I know that, but one has to wonder if he’s lost his mind,” she says in a hushed whisper. “Plus, it smells bad in this city.”
I snort and think, wait till you get to Bourbon Street.
“You get used to it.”
“You’re not staying here, though, right?” She can’t let it go.
I shrug. “I had a big heart-to-heart with my dad about him giving me some more freedom after all this stalker business is dealt with, and I think I got through to him.”
“What will you do?”
“I don’t know, T. But I can’t go back to what I was doing. That’s not living. It’s like being a bird in a cage that can never fly.”
She looks pensive for a moment, but she had to know this was coming.
I put my hand on hers. “I’ll be coming back, silly,” I say, hoping she’ll smile eventually. “But I want to get to know Rock better. We’ve barely had time to talk about anything…”
“But you had time to fuck him?” She raises an eyebrow.
I sigh. “T. You’ll understand when you meet him. Honestly, he’s a good guy.” I feel annoyance rising in me. Why does she have to be so judgmental? “And anyway, I thought you’d be happy I’d stopped moping around.”
“Like I said, I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“I know what I’m doing.”
“Do you? Because it sounds like you practically want to marry this guy.”
I snort. “Don’t be stupid. I barely know him, but I do like him. I thought you’d be happy for me. He’s so sweet, T. He makes me laugh. He’s protective and he’s so good in bed.” I throw that last one in because I’m being spiteful, and I know she won’t appreciate it.
“It’s not all about sex.”
“No. But it’s an important part. It’s not make or break, but it’s a bonus that he knows what he’s doing.”
She looks dubious. “And you know he’s not sleeping with other people?”
Panic hits me.
I’ve never even thought about that. I mean, I’ve never even asked him if he’s sleeping with other people as well as me. But he did say that thing where I wasn’t to sleep with anyone else, and I made him agree, too. Does that mean he isn’t sleeping with other people?
Am I an idiot for believing he wouldn’t?
And what has he been doing on the nights we haven’t been together?
Fear and jealousy rise deep inside me, and Tara sees it immediately.
She sighs. “Honey. I’m not trying to be a Debbie Downer on this. I just think it’s naive to expect anything more than a random fuck from this dude. Do you even know his last name?”
I swallow hard. I actually don’t know his last name. I know nothing much about him, to be honest.
I shift in my seat. “You don’t know the connection we have,” I say, my voice low. “I may not know him that well, but I know he cares about me.”
“I bet he says all the right things, just like Dylan.”
I shake my head. “No. It’s different, this feels…different.”
I wish she’d just be happy for me. If I wanted to hear judgment and scrutiny, I’d just go and tell everything to my father, or some of the other superficial “friends” I have back home.
Tears start to well in my eyes.
