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Grace lifted her right hand and placed it flat at the base of her neck over her collar. She met his gaze and held it as she spoke. “I’m ready, Master. Ready to be yours.”
***
Chapter 28
Alexander took his time responding. Hearing her call him Master had him wanting to take her right then and there, to hell with all the people around them. That, however, would most likely get them both arrested. Not exactly how he foresaw the evening ending.
He studied Grace, trying to get a feel for exactly what she’d meant by saying she was ready. She toyed with her napkin as she waited for his response.
Picking up his wineglass, he took a sip. “I’m going to need a bit more than that. What, exactly, are you ready for, gattina?” He’d added the term of endearment to let her know he wasn’t upset by her declaration.
Grace looked out the window, and then to him. Her eyes held something in them he’d never seen before. “I realized I’ve been holding back. Emotionally.” She paused. “I’m sorry.”
He’d known that, but he’d been willing to give her time to work through it. “You were still grieving.”
She nodded. “Yes.”
Several minutes passed as he waited for her to continue. It would have been so easy to brush this conversation under the rug and go on with their evening, but they needed to talk this through.
“When we started”—she glanced around the room before going on—“seeing each other, I hadn’t thought of sharing my life with another man. My heart still belonged to Kurt, and as far as I was concerned that was how it would always be.”
He’d known this as well. The love Grace had for her husband wasn’t in doubt. Neither was Kurt’s love and devotion to his wife. He’d been an attractive man and had numerous opportunities to cheat while they were deployed, but he never had. It had made Alexander long for that type of connection with someone.
Grace gingerly placed her hand over the top of Alexander’s where it rested at the base of his wineglass. He twisted his wrist so he could grasp her fingers.
“When you told my mom that you wanted to get married, I panicked. Not because I couldn’t see myself marrying you, but because I could. The more I thought about it, the more real it became.” She hesitated. “And then you said you loved me.”
Grace closed her eyes and shook her head, trying to keep it together. He gave her hand a gentle squeeze, encouraging her to take her time.
“I wanted to say it back,” she admitted, “but I couldn’t. It felt like, if I did, that I would be betraying Kurt. Giving you my body was one thing. Giving you my heart...”
Alexander’s own heart felt as if it was going to beat out of his chest, but he waited until she looked at him again. “And now?”
“Now I realize that what I felt for Kurt doesn’t mean I can’t feel that way for someone else. I don’t have to choose. Kurt was my past.” Her shoulders rose and fell as she took a deep breath in and let it out. “You are my future.”
They stared at each other across the table, holding hands. This was how their server found them when he brought their food. Alexander thanked him, not breaking eye contract with Grace, and sent him on his way.
After brushing his thumb along the inside of Grace’s wrist, Alexander let go of her hand so they could eat. She followed his lead and picked up her fork.
They concentrated on their dinners for a while, letting everything that had been said sink in. Alexander was the first one to break the silence. “I never want you to feel as if you have to forget Kurt. His memory lives on as it should. In both of us.”
Moisture pooled in her eyes, but she fought to keep the tears at bay.
Nothing more was said as they finished their meals. Alexander paid the check, and then whisked Grace out the door.
Outside, he steered them away from the parking lot to a walking path that led down to the stream. It was lit with the same holiday lights that surrounded the restaurant. He wrapped his arm around Grace’s shoulders and she snuggled close.
The sound of the stream became louder as they rounded the corner. It was chilly and there were no other people in sight, which suited him just fine. Alexander led her over to a wooden bench a few feet from the path, sat down, and pulled her into his lap.
Grace leaned against him, her eyes focused on the rambling water in front of them. “Thank you for bringing me here.”
He held her close and buried his face in the crook of her neck. “You’re welcome.”
The sounds of the night surrounded them as they sat. He took the edges of his trench coat and tried to cover some of her legs so she wouldn’t get cold.
“You know, I’ve never been to your apartment.”
Alexander grinned against her shoulder. “Is that your way of trying to wheedle an invitation out of me?”
