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“Will I now?”
His smile and the wink he throws at me, lets me know he’s joking, and it relaxes me somewhat.
The room isn’t much, but there’s a bed with clean sheets, and there’s a lock on the door. For tonight, that’s all I need. And maybe tomorrow night. After that, I’m going to have to start looking at alternatives.
Angel appears in the doorway with my bag, and Rudi makes quick work unzipping it and placing my toiletries on the old, worn dresser.
“My room is the first door on the next floor up, or you can call me. I keep my phone on loud in case the hospital needs me.”
“I’ll be fine, cousin, but thank you.”
Once I’m left alone, I kick off my boots and climb under the sheets. My phone lights up the darkness in the room, and for a brief, solitary moment, I hope it’s Mason.
It’s not.
It’s a reminder the water bill is due next week.
I pull up the text thread with Mason and know precisely what I need to say in order to be able to fall asleep.
“There’s no point in dragging this out. I’ve already said I’m keeping the baby, and since you don’t want to be a part of our lives, I’ll stay here in the city. I don’t want to live in a small town where I could bump into you at any given time. I don’t understand you anymore, and I think that hurts the most, and I am hurting, Mase. I didn’t know it was possible to feel this kind of pain and still carry on. But for the sake of our baby, I will. I thought we were for life. I can’t believe this is how it ends.”
I hit send before I delete the lot and power down my phone. He won’t respond, and I’m not waiting any longer, waiting for something that will never come.
I close my eyes, and instead of running through everything that’s happened with Mason, I imagine what life is going to be like with a baby, someone who’s going to grow up and call me Mommy one day.
I swear, the dog hasn’t taken its beady eyes off of me since I entered the kitchen. When it plods over in my direction, I tense. It’s massive. I can see how Luca would own a dog like this, but sugar and sweet, Victoria? I can’t see it.
He sniffs at my stomach and then drops his chin on my thigh.
“He knows there’s a baby in there,” Angel says as he wolfs down his breakfast.
“Smart dog.”
I stroke his head and laugh when he licks at my hand.
“Did you manage to get much sleep last night?” Rudi asks, joining us at the table.
“Yeah, considering how uncomfortable the bed is.”
“It’s not the best, but it’s better than the floor,” Angel chimes in.
I have an hour till my appointment at the hospital. Mason will feel better after setting eyes on his sister. Kyla will need her, and Emma will be there for them all.
“Are you ready?” Rudi asks.
I snap back into focus and nod, noting fifteen minutes have passed since I zoned out.
“What are your plans today?” Rudi asks Angel.
“Continuing the search. I’ll keep in contact.”
She leans over and presses her lips to his, and I look away. I’m happy my cousin has found her prince or whatever, but I can’t deal with lovey-dovey scenes at the moment. It’s already a battle trying to keep down the little I ate for breakfast, with morning sickness fighting me.
“Be careful out there,” Angel warns as we head out the back door.
We take Rudi’s car, and I’m happy to take the passenger side and let her drive. I don’t know the city or where to go.
“I know there’s a huge shadow over this moment, but are you even a little excited about the scan?” Rudi asks as the hospital comes into sight.
