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“Let me carry that.” I tried to reach for the bag, but she slipped for the door.
“I’ll meet you downstairs. Who knows, I might find someone to entertain me while I wait.” She walked out, shutting the door.
Darkness billowed up, tinting my eyes with anger. My head started to pound from the shitty drugs, and I felt the peaceful moment when I woke up evaporate into smoke.
The idea of one of those common whores touching her sparked fury in my blood. It felt wrong in every way. She was too good for that.
Dressing quickly, I grabbed my bag and hauled ass downstairs. My ire escalated at seeing her sitting at the bar, the bartender leaning over the table into her, a salacious smile on his face as his eyes roamed her.
“You are a stunning thing.” He touched her cheek. “I wouldn’t mind having you for breakfast.”
Oh. Hell. No.
“Dziubus.”The pet name fell from my lips, a term coming deep from my past, from another life. Strolling up to her, I lifted my hand to her face, my thumb dragging over her bottom lip, hearing her suck in at my touch. “I’ve been looking for you. You ready to go?” I shot a look at the bartender.
“I don’t think so.” She pulled away, glaring at me. She turned and smiled at him. “I was just offered breakfast.”
“Tobebreakfast.” The man’s gaze rolled over her with lust.
A growl I wasn’t expecting stabbed in my throat, my hand squeezing hers as I yanked her off the stool. She hissed at the pain in her ribs, but I continued to drag her out of the whorehouse and into the freezing day.
“What was that?” She yanked out of my grip.
“You don’t want that.” I nodded back at the place, indicating the sleazy prostitute. “Believe me.”
“Don’t tell me what I don’t want. I can decide myself.” Her fingers wiggled as if she wanted to strangle me. “Gods! Stop treating me like some kid.”
“Then stop acting like one,” I shot back.
“Oh yeah, you’re the semblance of a functioning adult.” Her voice rose with mine. “I might be young to you.” She stabbed a finger in my chest. “But at least I’m not a coward.”
I saw red. I saw blue. I saw black. Anger exploded behind my temples. “Coward?” I bellowed. “You think I’m a coward?”
“Yes,” she screamed. “You don’t face your pain; you live in it. You use it as a shield. As anexcuse. You hide in the numbness of your drugs and the shallowness of the whores, because there you don’t have to feel.” Tears sprang into her eyes, and I felt this went deeper. “There nothing touches you, but you don’t realize how much it hurts all those around you. You’re a selfish coward.”
Scarlet pushed by me, striding for the path, leaving me standing there. Speechless and knocked on my ass.
The fact this girl, a stranger, could shred through me, call me out, and leave me gutted was distressing.
But she hadn’t lived through what I had. Hadn’t lost both her heart and soul.She knows nothing of real life. Of true pain and loss,I told myself, stomping after her.
But something in my gut told me she did.
She had seen darkness.
Chapter 12
Scarlet
Snowflakes clung to my lashes, blurring my vision as I ambled down the road behind Ash. It had been hours since we had even mumbled a word to each other, which pecked at me like a chicken. The silence was only broken by a rare motorcycle or horse and buggy going by. Even though we were far out of the border patrol area, Ash still had us hide every time someone passed, his face recognizable.
My curiosity about why border patrol had his picture ate at my thoughts. What had he done? How did they know who he was? Was I with some criminal?
The questions sat on the tip of my tongue, ready to jump off, but I couldn’t seem to actually ask them. The events of last night and this morning slammed my lips together in annoyance. I couldn’t seem to shake all the emotions streaming through me, along with the nonstop loop of what I saw last night.
Under my jacket, heat bloomed up my cheeks at the memory. When he left the room, I couldn’t sit still, pacing and restless. All my life, I had fought between holding up this image, doing and saying the right thing, and wanting to tear it all to shreds. I was split in three—me, the monster, and the darkness.
The monster won last night. It wanted out, to shed the pristine, perfect image. To let down my guard for a moment. But what I found instead… Ash in a booth, with the whore’s mouth around his cock. The way Ash threaded his fingers through her brown hair as she sucked his cock, his head tipping back in pleasure. The man next to him gripped what the woman couldn’t get down her throat while he jerked himself off, staring hungrily at Ash’s cock. The woman choked as Ash pushed her down farther, her nails digging into his thighs.
