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Chapter 4

Aspen

The one time I wouldn’t have minded it taking him forever to fall asleep, and Carter went down for his nap with barely a whimper. I’d hoped for more time before I faced Weston again—at least a moment or two to wrap my head around the fact that the tattooed bad boy who’d swept me off my feet, knocked me up, and promptly disappeared, was really a super-secret spy with an excellent reason for his vanishing act.

As if he hadn’t been irresistible before, now I had visions of him as the hero in every action movie I’d ever seen. He wasn’t the villain I’d thought him to be for the last year. Instead, he was the kind of guy who saved other people’s lives while risking his own.

After spending so much time trying to force myself to hate him in an effort to heal my broken heart, it was almost too much to believe. I didn’t know whether I wanted to rush out there and tell him he was only going to be a part of my life going forward as Carter’s father or if I wanted to jump his bones and beg him to never leave. But I didn’t have any time to figure it all out because he was waiting for me in the other room.

I was pretty sure he wasn’t going to let me hide in Carter’s room for very long. As crazy as it sounded, other than thinking I’d tried to hide Carter’s existence from him, he seemed happy to know I’d given birth to his baby. The way he’d been looking at me made it clear he would be in favor of the jumping his bones option. And what fine bones they were. If anything, he’d gotten even sexier during his time away. The new ink I’d spotted on his knuckles was incredibly hot. Although, that could just be the months of sexual frustration talking. “Who am I trying to kid? It’s both,” I mumbled to myself as I turned on the baby monitor and grabbed the handheld unit.

After quietly shutting the door to Carter’s room behind me, I was fumbling with the volume dial on the monitor when warm hands wrapped around my upper arms. Weston had apparently made himself at home in my apartment because when he dragged me into my bedroom, the lights were already turned low and the sheets were pulled back on the bed. A bed he settled me onto before following me down to hover over my body.

I looked up at him and knew I was lost. I couldn’t possibly tell him I only wanted him to be in my life as Carter’s dad because it would be a bold-faced lie. I wanted more—heck, I wanted it all. I was just too scared to admit it out loud. I wasn’t ready to be that vulnerable with him again. We’d only spent one weekend together, but I’d had an entire year to miss him and mourn the loss of him in my life.

“I missed you.” I was so dazzled by being near him again that the admission slipped from my lips of its own accord.

His mouth curved into a smug grin, tilting at the edges. His smile was gorgeous and oh so tempting as he gazed down at me. But, it was his eyes that really got to me. His smile lit up the green orbs with naked pleasure, unmasked and right out there for me to see. He wasn’t trying to hide how I made him feel, and it filled me with hope for the future.

Hope quickly turned into desire when he brought his mouth down on mine. It was a gentle brush at first, a barely there caress to test my response. When my lips parted and I whimpered, he gave me more—so much more. His arms drew me tightly against him, crushing me against his body while his tongue swept inside my mouth and he devoured me with his kiss.

I linked my fingers behind his neck, holding on and kissing him back with everything I had. Butterflies swirled in my stomach, and my breath hitched. I’d fallen into bed with Weston so easily before, but this time it felt like a momentous decision—as though there would be no going back if I slept with him again. It meant risking my heart, and this time, I knew exactly how much it would hurt to lose him. But it didn’t stop me from reaching up and tangling my fingers in his hair.

He tore his mouth from mine, his chest heaving. That one lock of dark hair fell onto his forehead, reminding me of the night we’d met. My fingers shook as I tugged it back in place. My belly clenched when he responded by lowering his head and pressing soft, sweet kisses all over my face. My cheeks, my forehead, my nose. He didn’t skip a spot.

Each feather-light brush of his lips sent a tremor through my body. The passion between us had burned brightly during our weekend together, and it hadn’t dimmed at all—not even a tiny bit. If anything, it was deeper. More meaningful.

“Twelve long months,” he growled. “I’ve dreamed of you, each and every damn night.”

“You did?” I breathed out.

His warm eyes met mine, staring straight into my soul when he answered. “My thoughts of you were the only bright spot, the one thing which kept me going during the darkest hours of my mission. Knowing I was coming home to you when it was over was what gave me the strength to get the job done. Even after months of no contact, I clung to the belief that you would be mine.”

If I hadn’t already fallen back into bed with him, that right there would have done the job. It was so darn romantic that my panties practically melted onto the floor all by themselves. But it had been a long year apart, and there was one worry screaming in the back of my head. “Were you with anyone else while you were gone?”

He reared back, a look of shock on his face. “Hell no,” he bit out. “I wasn’t with another woman. How could I be when you’re the only one I want?”

“Neither was I,” I admitted softly and felt him relax against me once again.

“No other women for you, huh?”

“Oh,” I giggled, slapping him lightly on the shoulder. “Shut up and kiss me already.”

“I had a lot more in mind than just kissing you,” he murmured against my lips.

“Then you’d better get to it before I change my mind.”

“Oh, beautiful,” he sighed, trailing kisses along my jaw until his lips were against my ear. “Now that I’ve got you back in my arms, there isn’t a chance in hell I’d let you change your mind about us. You’re mine, and I’ll do whatever it takes to remind you of it every damn day.”

He went about doing exactly as he’d promised, stripping us out of our clothes quickly and efficiently. Once I was naked beneath him, his hand went to my throat and circled it. My pulse leapt beneath his palm before he moved it farther down my body, sweeping over my breasts and pausing while his fingers toyed with my nipples. While I writhed beneath him, his hand slid along my rib cage, down to my belly, and finally dipped lower to slide against my wet folds.

His burning green gaze never left mine. Not once. He let me see every ounce of passion he felt for me. The possessiveness and how much he’d missed touching me. It all shone from his eyes and cracked the wall I’d built around my heart during his absence. I was a trembling mass of need when he rose to his knees and circled his cock with his fist. My eyes locked on his hard length, going wide when I spotted two silver balls, one on each side of his cockhead.

“Holy crap! You got your dick pierced?”

“Fuck yeah, I did,” he groaned. “And it hurt like a bitch, but sinking inside you is going to make the pain worth it.”

“But why?” I asked, bewildered by what possibly could have motivated him to get a piercing like this while he’d been on an undercover mission.

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