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Wariness crept into her eyes, her hands folding demurely on the table. But, she nodded, staying silent, and waited for me to continue. As concisely as possible, I explained my job at the CIA and that I’d been undercover overseas.
Her eyes trailed along my arms and down to my hands, skepticism clear in her gaze. “My tattoos are one of the reasons I’m so damn good at my job when I’m out on a mission. I’m not exactly what most people picture when they think of an undercover agent.”
I could see she wanted to ask me about the details of my mission, but I gave her a stern look and she pressed her lips together, refraining from comment.
I was just about to tell her that I’d decided to put in for a job change when she spoke up.
“Are you going to be gone a lot? Because Carter doesn’t need a part time dad. I’d rather he had no father figure in his life than one that blows into it now and then, turning everything upside down and then blowing right out.” Her fingers were twisting together, whether from nervousness or anger, I wasn’t sure. She didn’t need to be either.
“No, I won’t be taking covert assignments anymore,” I attempted to reassure her.
She studied me, those fingers still tangling, her demeanor clearly agitated. “I appreciate your determination at this moment, and I believe you’re sincere, right now. But how do I know you won’t get restless? What if you become unhappy and begin to resent us?” As she finished, she avoided my eyes, focusing on Carter instead. She stood, and I tracked her movements as she scooped him into her arms, my boy fast asleep. She finally reconnected with me, swaying side to side, Carter practically an emotional shield in front of her.
I blinked at her a few times, digesting her words. How she could think I would ever come to regret or resent them was beyond me. It was obvious she was rebuilding her walls and pain pulsed in my heart, but the logical side of my brain argued that no matter how connected we felt, we really didn’t know each other that well.
“You’re going to have to learn to trust me, beautiful,” I stated truthfully.
I waited for her to say something, but she surprised me, turning around and walking out of the room. Putting my elbows on the table, I dropped my head into my hands, using the heels to rub my eyes. I was so fucking tired, but at the same time, energy buzzed over my skin. I was going to break down those fucking walls and right then, I couldn’t think of a better solution than to show her how much I truly needed her. To fuse our bodies into one so she would know how deep in my soul the cravings for her went. Decision made, I stood swiftly and stalked from the room, unwavering in my course of action.
