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“I’m freaking out a little. You know I like to analyze things before I take a step like this. There’s probably a conversation we’re supposed to have about how many kids we want, where we want to live, and our finances.” Any time I read articles about what to discuss with your partner before marriage, I always thought I’d be the one who followed each recommended step. But here I was, buying the ring before knowing if she’d say yes, as if we were on the same page.
“I think you have to go with your feelings when you propose. Does this feel right?”
“Definitely.”
“I think you have the financial stuff covered. No one’s more fiscally responsible than you.”
When the woman returned with the velvet box and the bill, I knew in my heart this was the right move. We’d known each other since we were kids. I knew Hanna wanted children, and I did, too.
Knox shook his head when Denise wished me good luck, and we headed for the door. “I mean, you already built the cabin, and she’s living with you, so you’re covered there.”
We laughed, the tension and uncertainty lifting. The rest of the process was easy. If I just followed my feelings, everything would be okay.
Outside, I took Ember’s hand, and she skipped along beside me. “Am I going to be a big sister?”
“One day.” That day was closer than it had ever been before, and it didn’t scare me. I was content. I still had to ask Hanna to marry me, but I knew I was making the right move. That no matter what happened, I hadn’t held back.
Ember rambled on about whether she wanted a little sister or a brother. When she was safely tucked into the back of the truck, I shut the door.
Knox clasped my shoulder. “Thank you for letting me be a part of this. I’m proud of you for taking this step.”
“You don’t think it’s crazy or too soon?”
“Timing doesn’t matter. Emmett proposed to Ireland after a few weeks, and then they were married shortly after that. You know how slow he is to make a decision. I think when you know, you know. There isn’t a need to wait. Besides, we’re not getting any younger, and life is short.
My father’s face flashed in my mind. “You’re right.”
“If you love her, then that’s all that matters.”
I nodded, overcome with emotion.
“You need any help with the date tomorrow night?” Knox asked, and appreciation for my family washed over me.
“I think I’ve got it.” Initially, I thought I needed Knox’s help, but now I wanted to do it on my own.
Knox grinned. “Good luck. I’m proud of you. You’re finally taking the steps to make your family whole.”
As Knox walked over to his truck, I wondered if that was true. Was I making my family whole? Thinking about Hanna living with us, my ring on her finger, marriage, and maybe more kids felt right, but more than that, it felt complete.
I’d drifted along the last few years, just trying to survive as a single dad, thinking I had to do things a certain way or refrain from dating and finding someone to share my heart and life with. But now that I’d put myself out there, I could see so much more for our future.
I didn’t want my brothers’ help with the date, but I’d take Ember’s input. I wanted her to feel part of this.
“What do you think about ice sculptures?” I asked her in the rearview mirror as we headed to our next destination.
“They’re cool. But I think you should keep it simple.”
“I was thinking about creating a winter wonderland, though,” I said, knowing she’d want the same.
“Yeah, that sounds good.”
* * *
I spent the last twenty-four hours planning the carriage ride and what came after. I hoped it wasn’t too much. I wanted to wow Hanna but not overwhelm her. At the end of the day, it was about us and not a production. I tried to keep that in mind, but it was hard.
I wanted to give Hanna everything. I wanted her to feel like the most important person in the world to us.
I hoped I’d accomplished that. I waited with Mom at her house. Everything was set up. Ember was watching TV, and I was pacing endlessly.
