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Then again, I have never been married before. And I have never felt about a woman the way I feel about Kat.
My jaw works as I hold eye contact for a beat before looking away. “Yes, I believe I do.”
“Never thought I would see the day.” Kiril chuckles. He leans over to slap me on the shoulder.
I just shake my head as I push him off.
His face turns serious. “Well then, you’d best find out if she truly feels the same and exactly what her intentions are.”
I know he is right. Even though Kat has told me how she feels, it has not yet solidified in my mind, mostly because of all the doubts I have. But I need to focus on finding out if she really is here for the right reasons. I am not sure yet how I will do it, but I do know Kat had better be telling the truth. Because if she is not, the results will be cataclysmic.
For both of us.
Chapter 17 - Kat
The ground beneath my feet cracks and shifts with every step I take. Every small movement feels like it might cause me to lose my balance and fall to my doom. No matter which way I turn or how I shift my feet, it does not change how fragile the terrain feels underneath me.
This is how it has been for the last week.
After Kiril interrupted Theo and my argument, we never did get a chance to finish talking about everything. About how he still believes I might be here to betray him. About how he can’t seem to give up control of things around him. Unfortunately for me, I am one of those things. I was serious when I told him I felt like I had more freedom in my father’s house, but what he did not give me was a chance to add that it is still by far better here with him than it could ever be with my father, partly because I love him, and partly because even through all of his flaws, he still treats me better than my father or anyone associated with him ever did or would.
I only want more freedom. I want to feel like I am not constantly being watched and like I have some privacy. I understand Theo struggles with control—I have witnessed this many times with regard to work and even in bed sometimes—but I had hoped we were making progress.
At one point it seemed as though he was loosening his grip, like he was finally ready to trust me as he had asked me to trust him so many times. Not that I minded putting my faith in him. If I have learned anything, it is that Theo is a man of his word.
That only seems to add to his burden, though.
So here I am, tiptoeing to the kitchen—as best I can carrying the extra weight of a baby and with my body getting increasingly more difficult to maneuver—because the little body inside me demands sustenance, but Theo is hunched over his laptop at the dining room table and I do not want to disturb him. I only make it halfway before Theo’s head lifts and his eyes connect with mine.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you.”
Theo leans back in his chair, stretching his arms over his head. “It’s fine. I was getting cross-eyed anyway.”
Said eyes only seem halfway open, his eyelids looking very heavy.
Abandoning any thoughts of snacks, I walk over to him and wrap my arms around his shoulders. Theo’s arms immediately curve around my middle and he drops his head to my chest, seemingly using my breasts as pillows.
We stay like that for a few minutes until I feel Theo start pulling back. I loosen my grip and he looks up at me.
There are dark circles under his eyes and his hair looks like it has had a hand running through it quite a few times. I also notice he is still wearing the same suit he was wearing last night, which means he likely did not get any sleep.
That would explain why he seems more mellow today compared to other days. He is probably exhausted.
I run a hand through his hair as I look down at him. “Have you slept at all?”
As expected, Theo shakes his head. He sighs. “Kiril and Paval sent me the information they were able to gather regarding the rumors about the families rallying to oppose us. I was up all night reading through the details.”
A few days ago, Kiril told Theo that word was going around that some of the smaller families were banding together to take down the Dubrovs. Each of these families on their own or even a few of them combined is not a big enough threat to be on Theo and his brothers’ radar. However, if what they had heard is correct, there are more than just a few banding together. I do not know the names—because Theo refused to tell me—but apparently, the list of the families they had heard were rallying might be a much greater threat than they ever expected if they are able to gain the cooperation of even one of the bigger organizations.
Needless to say, Theo and his brothers are a bit worried about this.
Theo has been storming around like a bull in a China shop, and as much as I’ve tried to stay out of his way, we still crossed paths a few times. Arguments had erupted for no other reason than he was upset about the way I looked at him or my tone of voice when I answered a question. None of the encounters had ended well.
His brothers have also not been to our house since they delivered the news. I am not sure if this is because they are preoccupied, or because they are avoiding me.
Theo does not know it, but I heard a hefty chunk of his conversation with Kiril about my loyalties. It had stung in more ways than one. With what I know about Theo’s trust issues, it makes sense, but it was still a deep cut.
So basically, tensions are high all around.
