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“Of course they do.” As much as I wanted to spend the day watching over Night, I couldn’t exactly take the day off. We’d just had a war. “Did they mention a time?”
“Around three.”
“I can make that work.”
“Good. Us Wargs will be there too, so you won’t be alone.”
“I’m glad.” My smile felt a bit more genuine. “I’ll have friends there.”
The rest of the conversation was brief. Dom let me know that Violet, Tavi, and my mother weren’t among those injured, and then he left to help deal with the injured. I returned to the bedroom.
Night had still been snoring when I left to answer the door, but as I entered the bedroom I found him not only awake, but trying to sit up. I rushed to his side.
“Wait, wait.” I adjusted the pillows behind him and helped him lean back against them. “Be careful, you’re still injured.”
“Yeah, I feel like shit.” His voice was raspy. “What happened?”
“You were shot with a silver bullet. By Evan.”
As I spoke, I watched confusion change to surprise on his handsome face. The memories slowly came back to him until his emerald eyes darkened with sorrow. I wished I didn’t have to remind him.
“I’m so sorry, Bryn.”
Those four words clutched at my heart and made my eyes sting with tears. “Wh-why would you be sorry?”
He touched my face and caressed my cheek. “I never wanted to put you in the position of having to take a life, especially someone that we knew.”
His touch sent me over the edge, and I couldn’t stop the tears. “He was going to kill you,” I hiccupped. “And before I could stop myself or think things through, I had him, and I-I—”
Night pulled me close, tucking my head under his chin. I sobbed into his chest, feeling the weight of everything we’d endured crashing down on me.
Night kissed the top of my head while I cried. “It’s not your fault, Bryn. It’s not.”
My hands clenched in the sheets at either side of him. The worst part of this was that if I had to choose between taking a life and saving Night’s, I knew I would always, always choose Night without hesitation. It was a side of myself I hadn’t known I’d need to address.
My mind went back to the fight with Troy, when I’d had the ability to kill him. I’d narrowly stopped myself. After all those days of pain and the constant beatings, I’d almost let my rage push me over the edge. And now, I’d taken that step with Evan.
My sobs became deep, shuddering breaths, and my tears dried. As I calmed, Night started to tell me about his first kill.
“I was sixteen when I challenged the Alpha of the Wargs. Peter was awful. He didn’t care about our land or his people, and he let the Kings take everything from us. I knew the Wargs deserved more, so I fought for it. I killed him for it.”
As he spoke, he rubbed my back in soothing up and down motions. “Everyone told me how proud of me they were. They said how grateful they were that I was bringing in a newer, more successful era. I spent months preparing for the fight because I knew I’d have to go through wolves that were bigger and stronger than I was. I thought I could live with taking a life, but I felt dead inside. Mom told me I was allowed some time for grief and regret, but that mourning period changed nothing in my life. I still had to live with my decision, and even though she supported me, I bore that responsibility alone.”
He touched my chin, forcing me to look up at him. “You will have to live with your decision, too. It won’t be easy, and I’m sure it’ll be even more difficult because you’re the most gentle woman I’ve ever met.” He pushed my hair behind my ear. “Know that I believe in you, and there isn’t a wolf worth his weight in fur who wouldn’t make the same choice you made for your mate.”
“I would do it again,” I murmured. “I love you, Night.”
“I know you would.” He kissed me gently. “I love you, too. I hate that you had to do something that was so outside your morals for me, when I’m supposed to be the one protecting you.”
“You’re worth it.” The memory of what I’d done was still fresh in my mind, but listening to Night talk about his past made me feel a bit better. It made me feel less alone.
“It doesn’t matter what time of day or what I’m doing,” he said, “if you need to talk about this, I’ll always be available to you.” He kissed me again. “You’re so strong, Bryn, and so smart. You’re not a monster, you’re an Alpha. You’re fierce and wonderful and you care deeply about your people.”
“Thank you, Night.” I almost started crying again, but managed to hold it together. This time, I initiated the kiss. I’d intended for it to be tender and sweet like the others before it, but Night pulled me closer and closer until I was pressed flush against him. His hands snaked under my robe to touch my bare skin.
I shivered and pulled back. “Night, no,” I said, though I was panting, though I wanted him, though I saw the sizable tent he pitched beneath the covers. “You’re still hurt.”
He smirked. “So what?” He met my lips again, his teeth catching my bottom lip.
