We were still loving up the good boy when Fee realized we’d arrived. She screamed in excitement and ran to us. “Papi!Lissie!” She hugged both our legs at the same time and squeezed us in her little arms.
We crouched to give her a proper hug, and I kissed her soft cheek. “I missed you so much, honey.”
She pecked my cheek back. “I missed you, too. I’m so happy you’re here.”
“Having fun, Princess?”
She nodded emphatically at her father. “This is the happiest I’ve felt since yesterday.” She gasped, only then realizing something important. “We’re making pancakes. You have to help and sing like Maui.”
Mia laughed at the counter, with a mischievous glint in her eyes. “This, I’ve got to see.”
Danny groaned, but he couldn’t hide his smile. After we greeted Mia, he washed his hands and jumped into work. While they sang and danced, following the demigod, I went back to the living room to help Haley collect the toys scattered around.
I was so absorbed in my task that it took me a while to notice all the frames around the place were facing down, hiding the pictures.
Haley noticed my confusion. “She can’t look at his photos.” Her soft voice carried so much pain that it broke my heart. “Ever since...that day, she refuses to look at them.”
“What about you?” I whispered.
She looked around, her eyes turning red. “Most of the time, it hurts too much. But there are moments when I welcome the pain. So, I have my stack of photos in my bedroom.” She shrugged and smiled sadly. “My own littleshrine.” She sat down on the couch, and I followed her. “Sometimes I look at them when Gabe’s sleeping. And I let him look at them when he asks.”
“So why not take them out? Even if you’re not looking at them, why leave them here as a reminder?”
She pulled her feet up on the couch to hug her legs. “As much as it hurts, I guess neither of us wants to let him go. Seeing his face, his smile is excruciating. But not having even a speck of him around is even worse.”
I touched her hand, unable to come up with any comforting words. She was living my nightmare: meeting the love of her life and then being forced to learn how to live without him. “You’re one hell of a strong woman for dealing with...so much pain and still being functional.”
She blinked her tears away. “There’s no other way. I need to be, otherwise I’d crumble. I need to think about Gabe.”
“How does he deal with it?” Our voices were barely above a whisper.
“He thinksZachyis coming back. He even claims to have seen him once. I didn’t have the heart to tell him it wasn’t real, and I’m dreading the day I need to tell him what happened. Or the day he realizes it on his own. It’s probably wrong of me to let it go on for so long.” She shook her head and pulled her necklace to touch the dog tag dangling from it. It didn’t seem she was aware she was doing that. “I’m being selfish. But every time Gabe says something about him coming back, even though it hurts so much, I get a glimpse of this fantasy where he comes to us. It’s a reprieve. Even if it’s a short one. So, I welcome it and keep my son thinking his fantasy is real.”
We remained silent after her admission, and I scooted closer so she could lean on me while she cried quietly. I saw Danny looking at us with concern brimming in his eyes, but I just shook my head when he intended to approach. Haley needed that quiet respite.
If I were a more religious person, that’d be the moment I’d pray for a miracle.
My talk with Haley left me somewhat on edge. It sounded like such a cliché, but the truth was that life was indeed too short. We had to make the most of it while we could.
That was why, as soon as we left Haley’s place, I asked Danny to take the three of us to my special place—soon to beourspecial place. I imagined a picnic day, some fun activities, and junk food for when we took Fee there. But I didn’t want to waste any time, the picnic could wait.
Despite not having anything entertaining for her, Fee seemed to understand, in her own way, that that place was sacred somehow. She stared at all its marvel in wonder, talking only in hushed voices. It could be a sugar crash, but I wanted to believe she was as entranced by that gem as I was.
“What is here?”
I guided her to a spot where we could see more around, and we sat down on the ground. “I don’t think it has a name. I just call it My Special Place.” I played with the tips of her hair. “I bring special people here.”
She stared at me with her big eyes. “So, I’m special?”
I kissed the tip of her nose. “The most. It was important to me that you and your father knew this place. I used to come here with my parents and my brother. They showed me here, now I show you.”
Danny came from the car with a blanket he normally kept in it and threw it on both our shoulders before sitting down with us.
Fee took my hand in hers and leaned against her father’s side. “If this place is special,” she whispered in reverence, “can I make a wish?”
Danny kissed the top of her head. “I think it’s fitting. Let’s all make one.”
She squeezed her eyes shut in concentration, and her grip on my hand tightened. Danny and I followed her lead and closed our eyes as well.