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‘Yes, you.Ilike your enthusiasm, but your dancing is very stiff.’
Unbelievable.Shewas already in trouble for incompetent dancing.Washe about to give her one of those tellings off, likeDebbieAllen? ‘Youwantfame?Well, fame costs, and right here is where you start paying.’Francescathought these classes were supposed to be for fun.It’snot like she was auditioning for one of the female leads inDevdas,aHindifilm with an iconic scene where two women battled it out on the dance floor.Well, she wasn’t going to take his shit.Hewas messing with the wrong lady.
Shecrossed her arms. ‘What?’
Heraised an amused eyebrow at her and said, ‘Stopoverthinking things.Youneed to just go with it, let the music move you.’
Whatdid he mean by that?Ifshe didn’t think about it, then how would she remember what to do? ‘It’snot exactly like breathing, is it?Ineed to concentrate.’
‘Tryconcentrating a little less.Feela little more.Smoothit out.’Hismouth settled into an expression that said,‘Doyou always want to suck?’
Herhackles rose. ‘Okay, you’re the expert.Showme.’Sheflopped her arms down by her sides, and gave him her signature impudent stare, pissing off teachers sinceYearOne.
Hechuckled and moved in front of her, so close she could smell the peppermint on his breath. ‘Fine.Iwill.’Takingher wrists in his hand, he raised her arms above her head. ‘Breathein as you do the first move, then breathe out’ —he brought her right hand down. ‘Thenin.Andout.’Hecontinued to demonstrate the breathing for everything they’d learned so far.
Francescacouldn’t get a read on him.Washe flirting with her?Werethey having aJohnnyandBabymoment?Whenhe’d first entered the room, she would have pegged him as gay, but now she wasn’t so sure.Hekept catching her eyes and holding her gaze in a very come-hither manner.Whenhe finished his demonstration, he winked at her and said, ‘Thinkyou can do that?’
‘Pfff.I’llgive it a go.’
Inthe second half of the class, her hit rate rose to about 50%, but she still wasn’t going to be winningStrictlyanytime soon.Asthe string of moves grew and grew, she felt her concentration waning with her energy.Thelast straw came at the end: they had to whip their heads around and she ended up with a mouthful of someone else’s ponytail.
Shewas done.Shecouldn’t handle any more dancing tonight.
Thechoreographer chose four of the best dancers to perform at the end so the others could record the sequence on their phones and learn the moves at home.
Francescaswore to herself that she’d practice this week and get the moves down perfectly.NextThursday, she’d come in and show that smug choreographer what she could do.She’dclaw her way to the top of the class if it killed her.Well, maybe not the top, but not the bottom, where she currently languished.
Asshe left the studio,Satya, the dance lead, called out that she hopedFrancescawould come back next week.Francescasmiled.Lookslike you’ve just found yourself a hobby, she thought.
11
StellapushedGrace’spram through the streets ofNorthLondonas she made her way home from the zoo.Thiswas her third time there that week, so she’d bought an annual pass.Theattendant at the entrance knew her by name.
Shecouldn’t wait to get back to work.Muchas she loved taking pictures ofGrace,Stellacraved some time with her camera and a grown-up model, to create whatever took her fancy.Ifshe didn’t do it soon, she worried that the skills she’d fought so hard to hone over the last four years would vanish from her brain.Themuscle memory she’d developed with her camera would fade.Already, she couldn’t remember half the things she used to know how to do inPhotoshop.
Noneof the nurseries where she’d waitlistedGracehad spaces yet.Atlast contact,DoodlebugDaycarehad said there might be a place at the end of the summer.Butno guarantees.
Andbecause she had been away traveling for most of the beginning ofGrace’slife,Stellahad no childcare network: no babysitters that she trusted, noNCTfriends to rely upon, no local grandparents who could pop in to watchGracefor a few moments whileStellatook a breath.
AndConnorwas already talking about having a second child.
Thethought made her want to staple her legs closed, although that would preclude the one thing that was still going strong in their marriage.Shesighed.Theircommunication wires seemed to be crossed lately, and it had all started with that stupidValentinaVavilvekshoot.
Shestill shuddered when she thought about the night of the dinner party.Aftereveryone left, she andConnorsat down to discuss what had happened.Apparently,Valentinahad pulled him into another room under the guise of looking at places to hang a picture and locked the door behind her.Afterthat, she’d thrown herself at him, but he’d pushed her away, explaining that he was married and he loved his wife very much.Shestill tried to convince him, but he was firm.Disappointed, she’d finally let him out of the room.
Stellareiterated that he must never do another shoot with that woman again.Shedidn’t care how much money it brought in.Hepromised he wouldn’t.
They’dsealed the promise in bed, doing what he did best, aside from photography.
Asshe lay beside him, watching his beloved chest rise and fall, she’d had another of her imaginary visions of doom, this time involving theScandinavianmafia and a car chase.DidScandinaviaeven have a mafia?Shequickly looked it up on her phone.Yes, it was called theJuggemaffian.Great.
However, since their talk,Connornever seemed to be around, leaving early for his studio across town and coming back afterGracehad gone to bed.Aftersix months of travel, he was throwing himself into work with a vengeance.Theydidn’t have money problems that she knew of, so she didn’t understand what was fuelling it.She’dgone from having all of his time to having none of it, and because she wasn’t involved with the business right now, she had no idea what he was doing.Hecould be shootingValentinaVavilvekevery day, for all she knew.
Butshe trusted him.ConnorKnightmay be many things—a little arrogant, a little selfish, and a little unaware—but he loved her.Hewasn’t likeNathan, the older, married man she’d had an affair with a lifetime ago.Nathanhad been her charismatic boss and she had been young, ambitious, and too eager to please.Hegroomed her to have an illicit relationship with him by showering her with compliments, assigning her projects to keep her at work late, and then offering to drive her home so he could pour his heart out to her about his failing marriage and horrid wife.
Beforethe affair started, she remembered how he’d touch her leg when he dropped her off outside her flat, and the sly, inappropriate observations about her outfit choices when they worked side by side in the boardroom.Itwas no wonder that she’d eventually fallen into his bed, like the inexperienced idiot she’d been.Andthen when his wife found out, she attackedStellain front of the entire industry at an awards dinner.Stellashivered.Inhindsight and with the help of therapy, hismodus operandiwas easy to identify, but at the time she’d been like a moth drawn to a flame.Althoughshe no longer felt guilty or responsible for it, she didn’t like thinking about that period of her life.
Acar honked nearby, snapping her out of the past.
