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“Best couple?” Nathaniel says cheekily.
The crowd cheers. I hear a loud whistle to the left side of the stage, where I swear I can see Sun and the rest of the XOXO members in the front row.
“Nathaniel-ssi,” I say, playfully, “don’t be silly.” On the screen, that’s all it says, but I decide to ad-lib. “That category is for fake couples, not real ones.”
Nathaniel’s bark of laughter is genuine, joined by the audience.
We continue with the script, which was written by a board of EBC’s writers and vetted by Secretary Park beforehand. It’s lively and fun, and we ad-lib whenever the opportunity arises.
I canfeelthe chemistry between us; it’s electrifying. We joke and laugh and flirt, even. We act as if we share a secret between us, and the secret, which isn’t a secret at all, is that we’re friends. There’s no one else I’d rather be on this stage with, no one who makes me feel as beautiful and confident and clever and safe. I trust him, and he trusts me, and because of that, we make a spectacular team.
“And now for our first performers,” Nathaniel reads, “in their awards show debut performance.”
“Please welcome,” I say. “ASAP.”
Thirty-five
Nathaniel and I catch the first half of ASAP’s incredible performance before we’re hustled backstage to the dressing room. On the way, we’re stopped by celebrities—presenters, mostly, but also performers—praising us for our natural presence on stage and our chemistry. After the first few run-ins, I notice that everyone seems to speak to Nathaniel and me as if we are, in fact, a couple. They ask us howwe’refeeling, what performanceswe’relooking forward to; Jolly and Heartthrob fromCatch Me If You Cantease Nathaniel, saying they basically set him up, and Byeol, who’s presenting with her costar, tells me that Nathaniel and I look like we’re a couple that has been together for years, and that I look happy.
I am happy. It’s one of the most exhilarating nights of my life. We have little time to rest, rushing back and forth to the stage. We’re walking off after our final skit together when a familiar voice calls out to me. “Sori-ssi?”
My body, which had been warm and relaxed with Nathaniel the whole night, tenses.
I turn. “D-Donghyun-ssi. What are you doing here?”
“I was in the audience enjoying the show,” he says, smiling widely. “You were wonderful out there. Both of you.” He extends his magnanimity to Nathaniel, before focusing once more on me. “My friend who invited me asked if I wanted to go backstage, and so... I hope it’s all right. Did I overstep?”
“No, of course not.” I attempt to hide my dismay. On our last date, I told him I’d have an answer for him the next time we met. But I’m not ready to give him an answer, especially not here, with Nathaniel looking on. I don’t know what to do, what to say. It’s one thing to pretend in front of Donghyun, who only knows me as Min Sori, daughter of Min Kyung-mo, model and variety show personality, but not Nathaniel, who knows me inside and out. I can pretend all that I want, I can lie and use people, but not in front of Nathaniel.
“Sori.”
I look up. Nathaniel’s eyes, when they meet mine, are kind.
“I’ll give you two some privacy,” he says. “I should get going, anyway.” The skit before was our final one. This is the end. With a short bow to Donghyun—who returns it quickly—he starts to walk away.
“Wait!” I catch his arm. “You’re not staying?”
He glances down at my hand, then up to my face. “I’ll go sit with Jaewoo and the others, then we’ll probably head out after your mother’s speech.” He doesn’t explain why, not in front of Donghyun.To see Jenny.
He’sleaving.Without me, this time for good. Before last night, he might have told Donghyun to get lost, dragged me into a stairwell, and kissed me breathless.
But on the Ferris wheel, he promised not to make me waver. He said he was listening to me when I told him I couldn’t be with him. This is him, listening to me.
I let go of his sleeve.
“I had fun tonight,” he says. Dimples appear in both cheeks as he gives me one last devastating smile. “We make a good team.”
Then he turns and walks away.
“Wow,” Donghyun says. “So that’s the XOXO factor. I think I might have just become a fan.”
I laugh outright.
It’s such a silly thing to say, and generous too, since I know he picked up on the tension between Nathaniel and me. He’d have to be quite oblivious not to, and Donghyun is not that.
Why did I think it was okay to use Cha Donghyun? Because I didn’t know him? That’s not the reality now, nor should it have been reason enough to use him in the first place.
He’s a sweet person, agoodperson. He’s just notmyperson.
