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“Susan. Again. I thought you had no use for me. I assumed, if I thought it through, that you had finished school, were happily married and settled somewhere. I had no idea at all you’d still own the motel or that you’d even be here. I came because I heard about the storm, and I remembered how bad it was after Evelyn. I have a company now that’s in a position to help and I have the time to help. That’s all I wanted to do. And if I am completely honest, I missed this island. Coming here again brought back some really good memories for me, believe it or not. And when Jo texted me today, I thought maybe you’d want to try to see how we can move forward from this. I know it won’t be easy but Jo and I seem to have made a good start.”
He stepped forward to try to take her hand but Susan stepped back. “No, Chris. Jo is coming at this from a very different place. She never knew you. Now, all of a sudden, she has a grandfather she never knew she had. It’s all very exciting for her. She can develop her feelings over time and as she sees fit. SeaAnna too. I knew you, Chris, and I loved you. And you’ve let me down before we even had a chance to get started.”
Chris stepped back and his voice took on a hard edge. “So then, just why did you want me to come out here and have this chat?”
“To tell you I don’t want any second chances. I don’t want to see you. I don’t want to speak to you. Ever. What kind of relationship you develop with Jo, or with SeaAnna if the test comes back with a linkage, and I can assure you it will, is up to you and up to them. But I am out of it. I’ve made it on my own all these years, and that’s just how it will stay.”
“I’m so sorry, Susan…”
But Susan cut him off. “As far as I’m concerned, we’re through here. Enjoy your time on the island. And if our paths cross, you don’t know me, OK? It would have been better if you’d never come back, Chris.”
“Would it, Susan? I’m sure now that I have a daughter and granddaughter. Would it have been better for me never to know that? It was probably stupid, itwasstupid, for me to ask about a DNA test. But I said I’m sorry and I really am. What else do you want me to do?”
“Please leave,” said Susan. She was trying hard to hold back the tears and she didn’t want Chris to see her crying. “Just go. Now.”
Chris shook his head. He opened his mouth to say something more but he didn’t trust his emotions or his voice either. He felt incredible sadness. Could he have handled this better?Yes, you damn well you could have, he told himself.
He realized he was more in love with the woman he was walking away from than he ever could have imagined. But she had been very clear. Chris kept walking and didn’t look up until he got into his car and drove out of the motel parking lot. He brushed away a tear and wouldn’t allow himself to look in the rearview mirror.
Jo was waiting on the porch for Lauren’s arrival when she saw Chris leave. He never looked up, never looked over to the porch to see if she was there. Jo had a sinking feeling that something went very wrong. How that happened she couldn’t know at the moment, but a few minutes later when she saw her Gran, limping slightly and clearly sobbing, her heart broke. Like Chris, her grandmother made no effort to come by the office, so Jo could only assume she’d find out more when she got home, if her grandmother was willing to talk.
It was only a few minutes later when Lauren pulled up. Jo gave her a very quick rundown of the things she needed to know for the evening, and then she was pedaling home. She didn’t know what she should do or say, but she figured whatever Gran wanted to do was fine with her.
When she walked into the house she could see Susan sitting with her back to her on one of the couches, a glass of wine in her hand. She sounded composed but not at all like her Gran. Jo walked over and gave her a big hug.
“Oh Gran,” she said. “What happened? Did he upset you? Did you argue?”
“Neither of those things. Jo, I realized over these last two days I loved Chris my entire life. What life could have been with him we will never know. But I also know that I can’t love someone who apparently didn’t trust me. And that’s something I can’t forgive. I just can’t. So, we’re through.”
“What do you mean, through?”
“I mean, I told him I did not want to see or talk with him ever again. If he sees me on the island somewhere while he’s still here working, he’s to ignore me.”
“But…”
“Jo, what you and your mom decide to do with respect to Chris is up to you. I won’t interfere. But just don’t think I’ll be a part of it.”
Jo slumped down in the opposite couch and took a sip of the glass of wine Susan had already poured for her. “That’s not what I expected, Gran, but then, I shouldn’t have had any expectations. It is your life, and I guess if this is what you need to do, I’ll try to understand. But it makes me sad.”
“It makes me sad too, Jo, but life is full of sadness. Lucky for us, we’ve had our share of good times too, lots of them. Just know that I love you, Jo. And I’m going to miss you so much.”
And with that, Susan began to cry again, real sobs that brought Jo to tears too. She walked over and took Susan in her arms and held her. They sat there together, each lost in their own thoughts as the day started to turn to dusk.
Susan suddenly looked up. “I saw that the roof on the motel looked in fine shape. Did someone fix it?”
Jo paused a second too long before answering.
“Was it Chris?” Susan asked.
“It was,” said Jo. “Well, it was his crew. Dad arranged it with him. He wouldn’t let us pay. Said he’d made enough mistakes and this was a very small way of trying to make good.”
Susan laughed but without humor. “Well, that‘s one thing he got right. He’s certainly made enough mistakes.” Susan got up from the couch. “I know it’s early but I’m off to bed now, Jo. We’ll have a better night tomorrow.”
Jo finished her wine and reflected on what had happened that afternoon.
No, thought Jo.This wasn’t how this was supposed to end at all.
ChapterEleven
