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‘I honestly just think kids flock to me because they know that they kind of freak me out.’
‘Or that time I was in here and you left me for half an hour to talk an elderly customer through emojis?’ She drops her voice at the end in case he’s nearby.
I’d forgotten about that day. I’d shown Stan-with-the-routinehow to use emojis, taught him what some of them meant, explained when it was and wasn’t appropriate to use them, all because a little piece of my stubborn heart had throbbed when he’d told me he wanted to seem cool when he texted his grandchildren. Josie continues, ‘I’m just saying, you’re good at that kind of thing. Explaining stuff to others.’
I’ve never thought about it before but I suppose I see where she’s coming from. I do kind of enjoy the satisfaction when someone picks up something I’ve taught them. The tiniest bud of an idea takes root in my head, but I don’t know what to do with it right now, so I box it up alongside the rest of my fanciful notions. ‘Yeah, maybe you’re right.’
‘As I usually am.’ She starts to yawn, covering her mouth with her hand as she does, always polite.
‘You’ve been working too hard.’ I take a sip of my drink and watch as she bites down a second yawn.
‘It doesn’t feel like work, that’s the problem. Consulting, doing talks, sitting on panels,thatfeels like a job. Sometimes it’s fun, sometimes it’s draining. But it’s what pays the bills. Doing this work at the gallery is a passion project. I mean, they pay me actualpennies,but somehow it’s the most fulfilling.’
‘I’m not just saying this because you’re my best friend, but I really can’t wait to see what you’ve been working on.’
‘Wait!’ she exclaims, making both Rudy and me jump. ‘I completely forgot to tell you, we found out yesterday that we’ve been approved for the grant for the central piece in our exhibition.’
‘Seriously? The installation you came up with about the seasons?’
‘Yep. My little baby.’ She grins, eyes bright, the nerves she had when she first mentioned it seemingly out the window.
‘Josie, that’s amazing!’I lean forward and ask, ‘I know you told me not to ask you for details, but how’s it going?’
‘If you find me wailing on the sofa one day, it’s gone terribly wrong. But for now, it’s looking good, and we’re set to be ready with it way before the opening in December. I reckon it’ll be your favourite part of the whole exhibition, actually.’ Her smile drops and she narrows her eyes. ‘But don’t ask me any more about it. I’m bad at secrets.’
‘My lips are sealed.’
‘Speaking of lips—’
‘Terrible segue.’
‘Thank you.’ She takes a single, dainty sip of her drink. ‘How are things with Finn?’
‘There are no lips involved when it comes to Finn.’
I should’ve known she wouldn’t let this go. Truthfully, I’ve done pretty well at reconfiguring my brain back to how it used to be before I drunkenly propositioned him the other week. Everything seems normal. If anything, he’s been more irritatingly unflappable than ever, pushing back against every borderline-disrespectful thing I say with nothing but a cheerful quip and a smirk. ‘And there never will be any lips involved, for the record. That’s not what’s going on here.’
‘I believe you.’
‘It’s not like that at all. I have a separate cohort of men for that kind of thing. Don’t pull that face. You’re thinking the lady doth protest too much. But you’re wrong, because the lady doth protest a perfectly adequate amount for the situation in question, which, as it stands, requires a certain level of protestation.’
Josie doesn’t move a muscle during my monologue. You know, in hindsight, maybe the lady doth actually protest too much.
She nods slowly. ‘I said I believe you.’
‘You do?’ I rein in my surprise. ‘I mean, yeah, obviously you do. Because it’s true.’ It’s true. Itis.
‘Sure. As long as he’s being a good friend to you?’ She tilts her head, the worry I’ve been scared of etched in the crease between her eyes.
I sigh, remembering how he walked me home in the rain, how he took me to the Barbican when I was grumpy and stressed, how he tried to set me up for an internship that sent me into a moderately-sized spiral, but was overall a very nice thing of him to do. ‘Yeah. He’s being a really good friend, to be honest.’ Another reason I’m glad nothing ended up happening that night. Sure, sometimes my brain fills with a what-if or two, but I’ve always had an overactive imagination.
‘Good. He’d have me to answer to if he was being a dick.’ My heart pangs at her protectiveness. ‘You’re spending more time with him than me recently. I’m sorry I’m working so much. I’m being kind of a shit flatmate. A shit friend, even.’
While I’d definitely envisioned a lot more singalongs and movie marathons in the flat this year, I’m not going to tell Josie that. I don’t want her to feel like she’s disappointed me in any way. I’m not sure she could disappoint me if she tried.
‘You could never be a shit friend. You’ve been working hard being such agirlboss.’ My mouth twitches at the last word.
‘Please never say that again.’
