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Nothing about today was going to be as easy as this moment right here, but after the scare I got coming home from the races with Bodhi, thinking that maybe this would be the time I walked into my house to find my mother’s dead body lying across the kitchen floor… everything came back into perspective for me. I knew then and there that dragging Bodhi into this chaos wasn’t fair in the slightest. So, I had to end it before it had even had a chance to fully begin.

The gate slides open silently and I pull up the long cobble drive, parking beside his GT-R. It’s been completely repaired since the night of the accident, and I can only hope my Camaro is in just as good condition when I get it back. Whenever that is.

I cut the engine and sit there. Everything around me swims in the early morning wash of blue. I draw in a shaky breath and curse when my lower lip trembles.

This has to happen, and somehow, I know I have to leave before the sun rises, or else I might not leave at all. And what if I don’t? What if I change my mind and decide to see this through? Convince myself that Bodhi is a grown man, and he can handle himself given the situation calls for it? He is capable of making his own decisions.

I also know that I haven’t given him the entire truth. He knows Mateo is responsible for getting Eli put in jail, but nothing beyond that. However, he has his own reasons for hating the guy. Number one being his suspicion that Mateo sold to the guy responsible for causing the wreck that took his older brother's life.

Asking him to enter into a relationship with me blindly, not knowing the threat that hangs over my head, would not only be extremely irresponsible of me, but selfish.

Yet, the thought of leaving him… of getting out of this car and walking away, never saying another word to him. Never seeing his face again, or hearing his infuriating voice as he calls me Princess. It makes my heart ache in a way I never knew it could. A way that I would never admit to him being the cause of.

To think that this insufferable man was able to scale my walls and find the part of me I hid away for safekeeping and convince her to care for him. If you told me a month ago that I would be sitting here now, on the verge of tears in Bodhi Kane’s driveway, trying to convince myself to get out of his car and walk away forever, I wouldn’t believe you. I hardly do now.

My life before he crashed into me was methodical and planned; it left zero room for joy. Sure, nothing about the last two years was normal. I worked, raced, and paid bills — or debts, depending on who you ask. But that was it. No friends, no fun, and no freedom. It sucked.

Then Bodhi came in and turned everything upside down. He brought unexpected laughter at times I didn’t realize I needed it. He made me light again, and I wanted to hold on to that with everything in me. But I can’t. I won’t risk his safety just for a handful of happy moments.

Hot tears fall from my eyes, and I reach up to swipe them away. I refuse to break down in his driveway when I should be climbing out of this car and walking away. Dropping my head back against the seat, I let my gaze settle in the distance, beyond the valley that houses Bodhi’s personal racetrack.

Warm shades of pink kiss the horizon as golden rays of morning cut across the sky, the first indications of dawn just visible in the sliver of light peeking up beyond the mountains.

A choking panic claws its way up my throat. I have to leave, and I have to leave now.

I scramble to release the seatbelt strapping me in. I throw it off, reaching for my phone and scanning the car again before pushing the door open and stepping out. I close the door as gently as possible, staying quiet, and then turn away.

Only I don’t make it one step.

“Really, Princess? You’re just going to leave without a goodbye kiss?”

Fuck.

Chapter 30

The alarm system on my phone woke me up. The front gate had been opened, and I wasn’t expecting company.

One look at my clock shows it's just past six in the morning. I haven’t had nearly enough sleep to deal with this shit right now.

The race this weekend sucked. It really was just caution after caution. Then there was an accident that I thankfully wasn't part of, but I still didn’t win. Honestly, I wasn’t even mad about that. It was my dad's attitude afterwards. The dismissive way he treated my mom and grandparents. It left me on edge and ready to fight someone. Top all that with the ten-hour drive back home, and the fact that I didn’t actually get to bed until about two, and this little disturbance has me immediately fuming.

I grab my phone and pull up the screen that shows live camera footage of the front part of my house and pause.

That’s my car. The car that Keaton is borrowing.

It takes me longer than I’m proud of to realize it's her. However, once I do, I think, maybe she came to see me. Only I know that isn’t the case.

Keaton has been avoiding my texts since we got home from last weekend’s race.

We had a great time, talked more than we ever had before, and even ended up on a date. She probably won’t admit it was a date, but it was. Then, out of nowhere, she kissed me. That fucking kiss has been playing on a loop in my mind all week, and the number of times I’ve had to rub one out just to clear my mind of her is ridiculous.

Then we get home, and she ghosts me.

I knew what it was, too. She moved way too fast and scared the shit out of herself. Suddenly things felt real, and I guarantee the thought of letting me in has her freaking out.

Well, too bad, Princess. I’m not letting you get away that easily.

I watch her for another minute, wondering if she’s going to start the car and drive off, but when I see her reach up to wipe her eyes, I can’t stay still any longer.

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