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Had I pushed him too far?
Relief coursed through me as he gathered me close. He didn’t ask what I needed or make excuses and try to leave. He just pulled me to his chest and kissed the top of my head. If he was that tender, he couldn’t be mad. Could he?
Hands smoothed over my body and he held me tight, like there was nothing else in the world he’d rather be doing. True or not, I didn’t want to let the fantasy end. Everything about the night had been perfect. His teasing comments at dinner, the hesitant looks, the touch of his lips against mine, the way he’d finally taken over and become Master again…
Did it have to end?
Was it one of those moments we’d walk away from, both straining to ignore what had happened until it was something that would never be mentioned… until it pushed us apart? His hold started to relax, and it was suddenly too much — or maybe it wasn’t enough.
“Don’t let go.” I didn’t even realize the frantic words had come out of my mouth until his arms tightened around me again.
“I won’t.” Owen hugged me tightly to him, and I breathed in his scent. “Except to maybe get a little more comfortable.” He offered me a crooked smile. “I’d bitch about my ass being sore from this floor, but I think you probably have me beat there.”
“But you’ll stay with me? I know it’s not something we talked about, but—”
Owen cut my words off with a finger against my lips, “I’m not going anywhere, Adri.” He almost sounded like Master, but he almost sounded like my brother, too. Either way, it wasn’t quite the voice I was used to. It was somewhere in between, warm and rich and soothing.
I snuggled close, not trying to hide how much I needed his touch. Everything felt topsy-turvy, like I’d just gotten off one of those kids’ rides that spun in circles until you weren’t sure which way was up. Only Master was anchoring me, and I wasn’t ready to let him go.
I wasn’t ready to have Owen back and let Master fade away. I wasn’t ready to lose the rock that was holding everything down. Owen was usually part of the storm, but when he was Master, he felt like the only thing keeping me together.
He pressed another kiss to the top of my head and gave a low chuckle. I closed my eyes and sighed, pressing a kiss to the side of his neck. When one wandering hand reached down to grab my tail, I thought he was going to play with it again, so I was surprised when he took it out. It left me feeling… oddly empty.
“Is my pup being greedy?” Owen teased, his voice playful.
I blushed a little but pushed my face closer to him so he couldn’t tell while he put the plug aside. “It feels weird without it. I like my tail. I like being a puppy with you… Master?”
“Good,” Owen replied, smoothing his fingers through my hair. “Because I like you being my puppy.”
Warmth ran through me, the idea of being not just a puppy, but his puppy making it sound even better. “I like being your puppy, Master.”
Maybe it was too sappy, but I had to make sure he understood it wasn’t just a onetime thing for me or something that wasn’t important. I wasn’t sure what we were or what was going on, but it was more than that… It was special.
The way his breath caught told me he understood, and I was instantly on edge again. That knee-jerk expectation of rejection was still alive and well. But he only pressed his nose against my hair and breathed in, his arms briefly tightening almost painfully in the intensity of the hug.
“All… all of it?” he asked, stumbling over his words in a very not-Owen sort of way.
“All of it.” Part of me wanted to hide and leave it vague, but I didn’t want to give him any reason to question what I meant. As weird as the whole thing was, that would just lead to drama and arguments. “The tail. Your touch. You taking control. All of it.” Taking a breath to try and get my nerves under control, I forced the words out. “What about you? Did you like all of it?”
He nodded, but it took the words a moment to follow. “I…” He paused again, then his voice took on the familiar notes of Master. “Yes. Every bit of it, Pup.” I believed him, and it made that warmth feel even more comfortable.
“But,” and my heart started to sink, right until his finger gently nudged my chin so I could meet his eyes, so intent upon my own, “we need to get you cleaned up and settled. All right?” That lopsided half-smirk was so familiar, but at the same time, it felt utterly foreign, too. “You can add that to your research. You know what aftercare is, right?”
Nodding slowly, I tried not to look nervous. “It’s where you stay and make sure I’m all right. But you’re not just staying because you have to, right? I don’t want—” Owen broke in, shaking his head. “I know. I want to.”
Pushing away the fears I wasn’t ready to deal with yet, I attempted a flirty smile. “That means you have to help me wash up, don’t you?”
Owen laughed, a startled sort of sound that was surprisingly pleasant. I couldn’t help but be pleased that I could still catch him off guard.
“Hmm… Guess I can make that sacrifice. For research, of course.” Before I could start to panic all over again, he nudged me gently. “I want to. I want this. Stop thinking, or you’ll end up collared and plugged again, Pup.”
Was that supposed to be a punishment?
His eyes were smiling but the words were serious. I couldn’t be sure. If it was supposed to frighten me off, it wasn’t working.
“You don’t mind doing it again?” Not really what I’d meant to ask. “I mean, you said you didn’t, but when I want to relax and just… be a pup, it’s okay with you?”
He didn’t let me avert my eyes — not that I really tried, because it would’ve meant his fingers might move from my chin, and I didn’t want that at all. “Yes,” he said steadily. “I…” He sighed. When his hand fell away, I keenly felt the loss of his touch. “I like seeing you like that. Relaxed, letting things go, being free.”
