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“Fine.” I sigh. “But as soon as I’m showered, I’m going to see him. I need to talk to the doctor anyway.”
“No problem. Now, can you walk after that mighty fine fucking, or do you need to be carried?”
* * *
Back in my room,I step into the shower, seeking refuge in the soothing cascade of water. The steam engulfs me as I let the hot water wash away the dirt, paint, and blood from my skin. But I also let it wash away the fear and the uncertainty that has been clinging to my skin for far too long. The hiss of the showerhead drowns out the eerie silence that haunts me.
When I’m finally done, I wrap myself in a soft, warm towel and wring out my hair. I don’t want to take too long, don’t want to be away from Ghost, so as soon as I’m dry, I comb and tie back my hair, then dress in leggings and a baggy, oversized fluffy jumper, just wearing thick, warm socks on my feet. I’m dressing for comfort, I realise. Wrapping myself up in a fuzzy hug.
Ready, I head for the medical wing, but as soon as I enter the space, I see that it’s deserted. Panic sets in like a sudden surge of electricity as I frantically search the sterile room. The white walls seem to close in on me, their silence amplifying my anxiety. My eyes dart from one corner to another, desperately seeking any trace of Ghost at all. A drop of blood, a discarded bandage…anything.
But there’s nothing.
His absence is like a gaping wound, an unsettling void that sends shivers down my spine. I stand there for a moment, my shoulders slumping, guilt weighing me down. I should have gone with them. What if Donnelly came back again and took over. What if he attacked Honey? I need to find them both.
Just as I reach for the doorknob to leave, the doctor’s soft voice stops me in my tracks. “Kayla, please stay for a moment,” she implores, her tone unusually gentle, rather than professional. I turn to face her, her expression a mix of concern and empathy. My stomach knots with anxiety.
She sighs, meeting my gaze and revealing tired, sympathetic eyes. “I know we were going to meet next week but as I have you here now, I may as well tell you. Almost all of your test results came back clear,” she says slowly, as if choosing her words with caution. “Except for one.”
My heart leaps into my throat, and I clutch the hem of my jumper tightly, twisting the material nervously.
“What is it?” whisper, dread washing over me.
The doctor hesitates, her gaze locked with mine. “The pregnancy test,” she says, voice barely above a whisper.
A shockwave of emotions courses through me. Fear, disbelief, and despair collide in a torrent of overwhelming sensations. Tears well up in my eyes as I stagger back, unable to comprehend the implications of her words. I slump into a nearby chair, trembling.
“No, no, no. This can’t be happening,” I mutter to myself, my mind racing a million miles a minute. “I can’t be pregnant. Not in here, not now.”
“I’m really sorry, Kayla.”
“Have you told anyone?”
The doctor shakes her head. “No. I-I’m supposed to, but I kept the pregnancy test and request for contraceptive off your file. No one knows but me.”
I look up at the doctor, my vision blurred by tears, my eyes pleading for a lifeline in the sea of uncertainty. “Please,” I beg, my voice trembling. “You have to help me. You can’t tell anyone about this. What do I do?”
The doctor’s gaze softens further, her expression a mixture of compassion and concern. “I understand, Kayla,” she says. “Your situation is complicated, and I won’t disclose anything without your consent. We’ll handle this discreetly. You don’t have to go through with this.”
Her assurance offers a glimmer of relief, but the weight of the decision ahead still bears down on me like an unbearable burden. I swallow hard, my throat tight with emotion. “You’re right,” I admit, my voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t have to have it. But...” My voice trails off, the words catching in my throat as I grapple with the painful truth.
“But you don’t think you can get rid of it either,” the doctor finishes my sentence, her understanding evident in her eyes. Her words hang in the air, a stark reminder of the impossible choices that lie ahead.
As I sit there, grappling with the enormity of my situation, the room seems to close in around me, suffocating and oppressive. The weight of the secret I now carry, the uncertainty of my future, and the haunting spectre of motherhood in this nightmarish place combine to leave me feeling utterly trapped, like a caged bird yearning for freedom.
“You have to get me out of this asylum, off this damn island. I can’t have a baby here.”
The doctor’s eyes soften with sympathy, and she nods slowly. “I promise, Kayla, I will do my best to help you,” she assures me. “But with the chip….it’ll take some time.”
“Can you remove it?”
“I’m not a surgeon.”
“So you didn’t put it in?”
She shakes her head. “No. I didn’t. And I don’t know who did. All of the residents arrive with the chip already installed.”
“But can you remove it? I know you’re not a surgeon, but could. you?”
