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And the things I’d said to her? Not me. Or maybe it is me and I was never given an opportunity to show that side of me. Because I know that it felt good; it felt right. And it felt rightwith her.
Damn, I can’t wait to see her again.
And just as if I conjured her with my mind, a text comes through from her.
I forgot to ask you, are you free this weekend? It’s Em’s birthday and she really wants Aria there.
I look over her text message as I kick off my shoes at the front door. This could give me another chance to see her in an element I’ve yet to see her in. More chances to get to know her better. And without the opportunity to lower her body onto my face again—public birthday party and all.
When and where?
I head toward the shower after sending the text, needing desperately to clear my head.
twelve
Dakota
It’sliterallyeight-thirtyinthe morning when my phone starts ringing. I decide to answer it while I wait for my mom to get her shoes on and wait for my coffee to finish brewing in all its annoying slowness.
“Bitch, he did what? And this was on the first date?” Sterling’s tone is one of surprise and excitement, as I barely get the phone to my ear. and I groan in vexation because my coffee isn’t brewing fast enough and it’s too fucking early for this. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
Why did I answer the phone?
“Listen, I didn’t feel the exact need to tell the world that I used a man’s face as a chair while he—” I cut myself off to make sure my mom can’t hear me, my voice a whisper as I speak into the phone.
“Now that is a man who knows what he wants. I say keep seeing him.” We had been texting a little bit yesterday about my date when I was reluctant to tell her how my date went, but with no sleep and a major headache and a best friend who kept hammering to get the truth out of me, I let it slip out via text this morning.
“Hello? Earth to Dakota!?” I hear Sterling’s voice come from the phone speaker. I almost forgot she was still there.
“Sorry. Listen, I gotta go. Catch up later?” I respond.
“Yes, but I’m telling you, this Nolan guy sounds like he could be good for you. From what you’ve told me so far, he’s respectful in the streets and disrespectful in the sheets,” Sterling quips.
“Did you really just fucking say that?” I laugh, because I nearly thought the same thing after he left my house the other night.
“I’m not saying marry him or anything,” she pauses, and it gives me time to cringe at her comment. “Yikes, poor choice of words. But definitely give it some thought.”
“I’ll let you know.” I roll my eyes as I mix cream into the hot brown liquid sitting in my ceramic mug.
“Also, tell little DJ happy birthday for me.”
“I will but she hates when you call her little DJ,” I say.
“Too bad, she looks like your twin, so she’s stuck with it.”
With that, I hang up the phone and peek over into the living room to see Mom sitting in front of the TV.
“Ready to go?” I ask her as I gather the last of the party supplies to take to the car.
“Yep, Dex should be there in about fifteen minutes with Em. You think it’s gonna rain today? Weather app said twenty percent chance around two.” It’s the first time in nearly months she’s been out for something other than doctor’s appointments, a few grocery store trips, and school drop off so naturally her worries are valid.
Even though she’s not physically incapable, it’s the anxiety and depression that creates the most weakness within her. That and her ability to be as stubborn as a dog. It creates a mental block in her day to day, not allowing her to feel at peace and always on edge.
“Don’t worry Mom. That gives us at least two hours of sunshine. Nothing is going to ruin this day.”
“Everything is ruined.” I slump down into the picnic bench under the gazebo.
The cake is destroyed, most of the balloons had popped in the car. We left the paper plates at the house, no thanks to my early phone call with Sterling where my brain was so focused on giving her the details she so explicitly asked for, and the pizza was late and now sits cold. Twelve other kids run around the playground waiting for the birthday girl while their parents awkwardly make conversation because Dexter hit traffic and is currently twenty minutes late.
